PCE Thread of Denial--More Denial than ever!

[Lalaith-Elerrina]

Denying that I'm both sad and happy that my babies are growing up! Also denying that Nicholette ze bebee French Pea with whom I was pregnant when I first joined Torc, is now thirteen!!

[erinhue]

woah do I know that one. Dan was just a few months old when I found this place. he is now 16
I don't know when that happened

[Ladykat]

Denying that I have a doctor's appointment first thing tomorrow.

Oh well, at least I'll get to sleep in a little.

LK

[earendil81]

Hue, LK, thank you... apparently the finger crossing wasn't enough though. Seems I'm not anywhere close to being done with doctors right now .

I had a bit of a scare yesterday. Fortunately it wasn't a stroke but it sure as hell felt like it. I could no longer speak, had barely any feelings left in my face, arms and torso. Didn't lose consciousness though. I was in the ER for 6 hours. They let me out with a lot of tests to run, an appointment to take with a cardiologist and one with a neurologist. I'm on sick leave until Friday, maybe more depending on what the doctor says today.
I need to connect with my gynaecologist now because it might put a pause on the IVF process what with scans and MRI to do. Regardless I foresee a pregnancy that - if it happens - will be deemed 'high risk' and probably a longer mat leave than originally planned. Not sure how I feel about that at this point.

So yes definitely not denying that I was scared yesterday; I felt myself go really. I probably wasn't but I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. Not that I have any but you know what I mean. I just have a lingering headache though...

Hue, Lalaith, it's crazy that your kids are so big now. Mind you we all age right but wow. Wishing you the best of times with them.

Hue, do take care of yourself, though it seems Dan is ensuring that already .

LK, good luck with the doctor's appointment.

[IrisBrandybuck]

Sorry I've been gone all.

Hue, Dan is 16? Holy carp, when did that happen? He was just a little sprout when I started!

Eari: I have passed out twice in my life...both times due to dehydration, so I'm something of a fanatic when it comes to being well hydrated...even if you think you are. And you know...that sounds like Bell's Palsy to my. Ask the doctors...they may not have heard of it, but it comes and goes in sets around here...you'll have a year or two when you see quite a few people getting it, then you go for a while and never see it...I think it's caused by a virus.

all!!!

[earendil81]

Hey Iris, I'm familiar with Bell's Palsy; one of my employees in Toronto had that. No it wasn't Bell's Palsy, but it was what they call in French an AIT (accident ischemique transitoire); essentially the step just prior to the stroke.
Or at least that's what they suspect: hence the multiple tests I have to do now: cerebral MRI, heart tests, and this put a stop to the IVF process, which makes me sad. I'd finally come to a point of peace with regards to that and it was going to start. I have my appointment with the cardiologist on Sept 12 and I'm waiting to hear from the neurologist.
I guess we'll see.

I've had 3 days to recover and in truth it's no luxury. I'm still having a bit of headache and difficulties concentrating on something for a long time. I've slept a lot - nights + naps during the day - and tried to stay hydrated because there's a heatwave in Paris right now.

So yes, denying that this stupid thing is making it really hard for me to write or read or do much . I'll get over it.

[heliona]

My dad had one of them recently, eari. So did another friend. They both woke up from a sleep and couldn't remember people's names, how they'd got there etc. My dad's passed after about 30 minutes. Seeing as three people in as many months that I know have had a TIA (transient ischemic attack), it is seeming rather common to me now. Although you are a bit young for it. I hope all the tests work out - how horrid for you and your loved ones to go through this.

[earendil81]

My dad had one of them recently, eari. So did another friend. They both woke up from a sleep and couldn't remember people's names, how they'd got there etc. My dad's passed after about 30 minutes. Seeing as three people in as many months that I know have had a TIA (transient ischemic attack), it is seeming rather common to me now. Although you are a bit young for it. I hope all the tests work out - how horrid for you and your loved ones to go through this.

I'm a bit young for it; that's what everybody's been saying... My dad had one in 2009 but he was well into his 50s.
I can't even imagine how my parents must feel. No actually I do. They probably feel the same way I did when my dad was diagnosed with a stage 3 lymphoma and I was in Canada. Helpless, scared while at the same time knowing that coming back won't change much. I definitely scared my husband who has been weary leaving me alone at home these past few days.
As I told him, he can't put his own business on hold to take care of me but I can see how worried he's been. As far as I'm concerned it still feels surreal. But I was scared. Really scared.
I've been through many tests and MRI and other blood tests in the past 6 months; I guess it's just meant to continue for a little while .

It's definitely made me realize that I need to take some things more seriously and that others really aren't that important. I think work is definitely going to take a backseat; in the sense that I won't let it stress me out ever again. No point.

Sending love to all of you. And my thanks for your thoughts .

[heliona]

It's definitely made me realize that I need to take some things more seriously and that others really aren't that important. I think work is definitely going to take a backseat; in the sense that I won't let it stress me out ever again. No point.

Good. I know exactly how you feel. Like you, it took something major for me to take on that attitude. It's a shame it takes something like that for a lot of people to take stock of their lives and finally see what it important in it. Good luck, eari.

[Ladykat]

Denying I've let several days pass without posting anything.

Oh well, blame it on the book I'm reading. Once I start reading I forget everything else.

LK

[erinhue]

My life as a corporate boy wonder with a bullet nearly killed me. I quit a rather lucrative job with bang a rang perks and benefits for the more hectic far less well paid but far more rewarding life running this community center. Life is way too short to spend chasing things that really, ultimately, do not matter. In that pursuit we often forget what is truly important and miss the best things in life along the way. I am just very happy that I learned that lesson and had the courage to change my life while that life still existed and for the betterment of the new life I live now Stop to smell the roses is very good advice too few of us really heed

[earendil81]

Hue, my brother is a lot cleverer than I am. He's now a father of two girls, the oldest being 2 1/2 years. He's organized to move to a 80% time starting in September, i.e. he'll be working 28 hours instead of 35/week to spend more time with them.
As far as I'm concerned this is a feeding job since my husband is starting his own business and we can't live off air and water. But I'll take it easy. This was way too close for my taste.

Heliona, I will take care, thank you for the they're always appreciated.

Off to bed as that headache still won't leave me alone (it is better though: it started a lot later today after we spent some time outside)

[Ladykat]

Eari---sorry to hear about your headache. Hope it goes away soon.

I know what it's like to have a headache that won't go away.

Oh yeah....ummmm.....denying the weekend's half over.

LK

[earendil81]

So I went back to work yesterday. And I realize it may have been a mistake. So I'll be seeing the doctor tomorrow and see what he says.
I'm having trouble focusing and as soon as there are more than one person speaking to me at a time I can't understand anything anymore.
I spoke with HR and they said I shouldn't have come back in the first place.
I had to leave early today because I had dizziness spells.
Must say the most frustrating was the struggle to string a full sentence together. I had to reboot three times during a meeting. Not cool. Exhausting.
It takes me forever to type things because words elude me. My brain has definitely taken a hit.

I'm fine though. Tired but fine.

[Ladykat]

Eari---yes, get to a doctor A.S.A.P. Dizzy spells are no fun, I know, I get them sometimes.

I've been told that for a woman, dizziness could be a sign of heart attack. At least that's what they said when I went to the ER the time I was so dizzy I couldn't even move my head without the whole room spinning around.

First time in my life I ever went to an ER and didn't have to wait to be seen.

Take care of yourself. Rest. Sleep.

LK

[erinhue]

I am in denial that this ankle has had me miss summer by being grounded. I am also in deep denial that this is Labor Day weekend already

[Lalaith-Elerrina]

Denying that September is here already!

[Ladykat]

Agreeing with the two previous posters, and denying everything that they're denying.

LK

[Ninui]

Denying that the nights here are already cold and quite uncomfortable. Not looking forward to dreaded winter.

Hoping all is going much better for you, Eari. Wishing you well and you find out what is all amiss soon. ..

[Ladykat]

Denying my long, lovely holiday weekend is over.

siiggggghhhh

And there won't be another one until November.

Late November.

LK

[Ninui]

Denying I'm watching a marathon viewing of Homicide Hunter

"My, my, my"

[Ladykat]

Denying I just barely got back into my exercise routine, like two days ago, and yesterday I hurt my knee.

I'll never lose this stupid weight!

LK

[Ninui]

I deny I came in to see how it goes for everyone here and that I'm watching a guilty pleasure on demand. "The Dead Files"

[Ladykat]

Denying that the weekend is over already.

It goes WAY too fast.

LK

[Ninui]

Denying that my feet hurt as much as Hue's ankle !!

Hope your feeling better Hue ..

[Ladykat]

Hope you're BOTH feeling better Ninui.

LK

[erinhue]

In denial that I have to go to Physical Therapy today. I would love to deny that I am really ready to go back to work. I can keep the paperwork stuff going from home but I really am more of a people person and I cannot deny I miss the place. Hope the therapist and doctor do not deny me at least a partial return.

[prmiller]

I vigourously deny that my absence from TORC is from any slight or unintended unacknowledgement
of a post...
Having come to Canada again...Wow!
Our life really changed!

Life is starting to settle...slowly.
At last there is time to visit, to play, and to post.

[Ladykat]

Denying that I'm back to working on Fridays again.

I really got used to those 3 day weekends.

LK

[IrisBrandybuck]

Eari: How are you feeling now?

Sorry I was awol for a while...I let email pile up and then realize I'm missing stuff. When I worked full time, I actually had more time to clear out my email every day, or nearly so. Now that I'm technically unemployed I seem to have less time...

My husband and I spent a few days in Chincoteague, VA. When I came back and went to the house of the elderly friend I help watch, he gave me a big hug...I think he missed me!