Once There Were Words

[earendil81]

In a moment Ryomer offered her the formal salute of a soldier to a Captain or the ruling family of Gondor. Few today knew of who she is but he did; fewer probably knew of Rholarowyn's ties to the Stewart but he also did. Maybe he was not one to reckon as an enemy but she had no way to be sure and she'd rather apologize for a misunderstanding than taking the risk of an untimely death for anyone.

She tightened her hold on the sword - one too heavy for her in fact - as she heard noise coming towards them; with her ears whistling with anger at her inability to determine Ryomer's allegiance she had not noticed it before. Or maybe it was because of the music of the evening that covered almost every other noise even to her elven acute sense. Joham came into the picture followed by men armed to the teeth for such a place.

As the discussion unfolded it became obvious that Joham and Ryomer knew things she ignored; she realized she should not be upset about it, but she did not like being kept in the dark. And by all reckoning she was still an official representation of the king's power in these parts. She might not hold the title of Earl or Mayor or anything but she was one of the few left among the Rangers of Arnor and even though she had left most of it behind, it still defined her very much.

Joham addressed her then, softly, in a way that reminded her of how she would address her son as he was about to hurt his sister just because she had angered him. “Earendil would you please help escort…”

"Lienoril,” The Gondorian answered carefully.

“Would you please help me and the men escort Lienoril to the Council Chambers?”
She nodded and lowered the sword as Joham spoke again to Ryomer. She repressed a snort; she was now a messenger to the village leader. How ironic! And he knew obviously more than her in whatever was happening just now. Well for Rholarowyn's sake she would do as she was bid, but she was expecting some sort of explanation. So with a head movement she motioned the man to move and follow the group. She had no way of knowing where the Council Chambers were; she had not arrived by daylight and had not taken in all the surroundings. She may be guiding the Gondorian but she was guided by the posse gathered by Joham.

There were many questions to be asked; some she might not have the right to ask in any other occasions, but whether for the purpose of protection or not, an attack against the house of the steward was no small matter. And so she asked, before they reached the Chamber.
"What are you doing here Lienoril? Why would you attack the Prince's cousin? Who is your patron in this endeavor? The King? If so, why did he not send me a message? He will know where I am at this time of the season."

[Rholarowyn]

Lienoril marched beside Earendil, silently cursing himself. The ferocity which had prevailed over his senses when he finally had Rholarowyn bound by the wrists and pinned against the ground had shocked even him. It was one moment, but in that one moment he could have ended it all and he knew she had seen it in his eyes.

"What are you doing here Lienoril? Why would you attack the Prince's cousin? Who is your patron in this endeavor? The King? If so, why did he not send me a message? He will know where I am at this time of the season."

He glanced sideways at the woman who was almost his height and still held his sword. “I am under no orders from the King.” He began in his more formal voice. “But there is a threat greater than I you should be concerned about.”

The Gondorian turned his attention to the men in front of them as they stopped in front of the Council Chambers.

*******

“Nayaran is with Malmiuta,” Joham whispered to Rholarowyn as he passed on her offer for her sword and instead placed his hand upon her shoulder. “He will be safe with her.”

The shieldmaiden nodded and watched as Eari, Lienoril, and the three men departed with Joham following some distance behind. She then turned to the Rohirrim and saw the blood mingling with the stubble on his face. “Tooth or tongue?” She asked reaching into a small pouch tucked into her tunic. “Cheek,” he answered, “and his boot caught me here,” rubbing his lower left jaw. “Take this,” the woman offered a small piece of a rubbery plant square. “Place it in your mouth, up against your cheek. It will stop the bleeding.” Then she moved towards the barn.

With the lantern in one hand and sword in the other the woman disappeared into the dark entrance. Ryomer followed and found her in the tack room with the lantern raised shuffling through some dusty bottles on the main shelf. “Do you have any fresh water?” she asked when he appeared though she kept focused on the little glass containers trying to read the labels. Ryomer disappeared and returned a moment later with his water bag. “Here,” she said brushing the thick layer of dust of an old harness box, “have a seat.” Smiling, the Rohirrim quickly obliged. After hanging the lantern, she was soon sitting at his side with a wet rag slowly trying to distinguish between flesh, stubble, blood, and wound.

Ryomer winched, “Sorry,” she said softly, “but it has a lot of dirt.”

“Don’t be!” He answered openly. “I have waited for this day for over 14 years.” The shieldmaiden pulled her hands back and noticed the sparkle in his blue eyes. “Oh yes, this was the day I was supposed to be dashing and daring, impressing you with my strength and stealth, and saving you from harms way of course. Never…never….did I imagine I would finally share my fateful day helping to make bread and then having you tend to me after getting my face kicked in my a man who was presumably my best friend…” Ryomer finally stopped.

Her quizzical look encouraged him to continue.

“To you I was just a young boy whom you helped one day along time ago? Think back, before the War of the Ring, it was during the Festival of the Horse, the one where you won the 8 mile horse race on your grey gelding Tamir. You had beaten out all of the men in the field and you held your head high for the rest of the day. Nothing could conquer you. Just before nightfall there was a boy, around 10, who was trying to hit the wooden target with his throwing dagger. The drunk men nearby were unmercifully mocking him. Then you showed up and taught me. You spent over an hour and by the end you had made those men eat their words.”

Her eyes lit up with recognition. “Yes…yes I remember, and when we were done he wanted me to promise him that once he could hit the center of a target 10 times in a row he was to come show me and I would share a dance with…you are the young boy!”

“Ouch…” Ryomer feigned being stabbed in the heart. “But yes I am the one... I have to confess, I've had a crush on you ever since.” The woman smiled, and then laughed. “Well Ryomer of Rohan, tell me have you ever accomplished my challenge.”

“More times than you will ever know M’lady. I do believe a hundred dances would not cover the promise now.” Silence fell as the shieldmaiden resumed cleaning the wound and then dressed it with the finest horse dressing the stable contained. Standing up she placed the small bottle back on the shelf and heard the Rohirrim stand up behind her; however she did not turn around. “Rholarowyn,” his voice was more serious now. “There are some things I need to tell you.”

“Go ahead,” she said quietly.

“Bryttar, he sent a letter with me. He wanted to come, but his wife, Rylar, she is about to have their first child.” Ryomer reached into his tunic and pulled out the crinkled letter. “You have no idea how grateful he is to know you are alive.” Slowly she turned around and took the letter from the Rohirrim. Her name on the front was written by Bryttar’s own hand and it smelled of Rohan in the spring.

“Thank you Ryomer, for bringing me this.”

“Rholarowyn,” he spoke reassuringly now, “there is more.” Gently he took both of her hands, which were still damp from the rag, after she tucked Bryttar's letter away. “Please sit down.” Together they returned to the harness box and again Ryomer reached into his tunic. This time he took out a traveling writng journal that was black and had the White Tree of Gondor embossed on its front. There was also a small, white leather bag. Together he placed them softly into her open hands. Immediately the women knew the items and who they belonged too.

“I wasn’t supposed to be the one who told you…”Ryomer began and then paused.

“When…?” The lump in her throat stiffling her words.

“About 5 years ago.”

“How...?”

“He heard a rumor that you were alive, he quit his post as the Captain of the Pelargir Guards and went East in search of you.”

“Alone...?” she asked rising and then started into the darkness.

“No, others went with him. Most of us returned but he did not.” Ryomer let the news of Bandoril’s death settle a little longer before he spoke again. “We need to get back to the plaza, we need to…”

“Which tribe?” She turned asking him with her heartbreaking green eyes. “Which tribe captured him?”

The Rohirrim moved in closer and tenderly took her arm. “Why…what does it matter?”

The woman distressingly leaned her head into his shoulder, “If I know the tribe,” she breathed in, “then I will know how he met his fate.”

.

[earendil81]

“I am under no orders from the King.” He began in his more formal voice. “But there is a threat greater than I you should be concerned about.”

Formality; so he was a guard, or at least a servant of the tower. At least at one point in his life. She'd have relaxed her guard if she had not been so upset about being caught unaware in such a situation and at a time when she really did not want any trouble to come her way. She was heading home and had no desire to be entangled in circumstances that would keep her from her beloved ones longer than necessary.

Apparently it was a mission of protection and one not undertaken under orders of the king; consequently she would usually not have to worry about it, but she knew better. First of all, Rholarowyn was her friend, and if there was a threat to her life, she'd be there this time. Second, if the threat brought a man of Gondor and one of Rohan - and Joham who was supposed to be nothing more than a village leader - together, then she would be in the middle of things whether she wanted it or not.

They stood by the chambers for a moment until Joham sent the other men away and guided them in. She was with two men and in a position she did not like; they knew something she did not. Joham invited Lienoril to sit and she stepped away to stand by the door; some habits were hard to shed.
"Please sit Earendil," said Joham.
"Thank you."
Until she was certain nothing else was to happen she would not drop her guard. She'd been in that place one time too many and she was not to reiterate such a mistake. She could feel the tension in her body; a tension she would have expected to have lost with the passing time, the one that proved the bound between her mind and muscles, the tension of battle. The Gondorian actually looked with an expression that was mixed with resentment, hurt pride and - was it possible? - a slight bit of awe. She was probably imagining this.

"You still are fit enough despite bearing children Captain" The tone was not menacing but still there was something uncanny about him knowing this much about her life. The title also showed that he actually knew who she was and it was annoying that it did not trigger her memory. She nodded though controlling herself and responded with more grace than she actually felt.
"I guess it is a compliment. But you seem to know a lot more about me than I do of you. I doubt we ever met. Nonetheless your name is familiar."
"I am surprised you even heard it; but it was hard not to know of you in Ithilien or Pelargir."

When she heard the port city name she knew who the man was. Had she not served with his brother a number of times before the war? He was also a good friend of Rholarowyn a man who had helped her improve as a warrior after the Warden's departure. And he was dead; the news had come with a letter and an order from the king some five years ago.
"I was sorry to hear of Bandoril's death; he was a fine and honorable man."

The man seemed to tense slightly whether in anger or in surprise that he had led her to know who he was. Or maybe because he did not like to be reminded of the fact; who liked to recall the reasons - most usually painful in a soldier's life - for an early death, for Bandoril was not yet old in the reckoning of men or soldiers for that matter.

They exchanged no further word. Still the tension seemed palpable and she only wanted to know what was happening that should create such a sense of threat. Hopefully, when Rholarowyn and the Rohirrim joined them, there would be a meaning to this.

[Rholarowyn]

The festivities were still going strong as the lone chair in the baking booth held only Chugg. A few women came by asking about the Rohirrim stranger but the man’s answer was simply he didn’t know. As time continued to pass his concern grew, and though it was against Joham orders, the short but sturdy man left his post and made his way back to the barn. They were just emerging as he reached it. Rholarowyn had been upset, this he could see, but it did not seem to be because of the Rohirrim who was walking protectively beside her and carry her beloved Elven sword now sheathed.

“Joham would like you both at the Council Cambers now.” He stated formally.

Rholarowyn nodded in affirmation and the two continued on silently. Ryomer carried her sword and examined its make in the low light. It was, carved with intricate, delicate features on the hilt; however, if the light had been better he would have seen the sheath had different representations of events that had been a part of Rholarowyn's life. Scene's of a childhood in Rohan, young adulthood in Minas Tirith, membership into the Bard’s and Mithril Knight Guilds, and 2 representing her years spent in the East. The sword may have held secrets from many centuries, but the sheath was clearly created for her.

With the proper knock, Joham appeared from behind the locked door and allowed the two entrance into the chamber room. The solid, wooden door was then securely closed behind them. After descending down a small staircase the three entered the chambers. The oval shaped room was well lit with lanterns hanging every two feet around the outer, earthen colored, curved walls. Large step like benches were build into the earth and reached up towards the outer walls acting as seats for the times larger crowds needed to be present. Today, however, there were only five in the room, Eari and Lienoril were both sitting on opposite sides of the rustic, oval table that would normally hold nine men and one wise woman. “Please sit.” Joham suggested with his hand extended.

Rholarowyn took a seat next to Eari, while Ryomer set down her sword upon the table directly in front of the two. He then went to the other side and sat next to the Gondorian. Joham took a seat reserved for him at the head of the table.

Lienoril’s emotions were still fighting within him, but with one look at the shieldmadien he could not miss her anguish. Ryomer had obviously given her the news of his brother’s death. He felt a small rush of victory surge through him.

“Ryomer, may I please see it again.” A moment later the Rohirrim retrieved the letter and handed it to the village leader. Carefully Joham reread it, letting each statement sink in. Once done he placed the opened communication down upon the table.

“Rholarowyn,” Joham began, “Apparently there are those in the East who are not through with you…”

“What?” the shieldmaiden asked looking out from her internal fog. Even Eari’s supportive placed hand upon her upper arm had gone unnoticed. Joham repeated the statement and then continued “… when you left the East, what items did you take with you?’

“I didn’t take anything!” she stated matter-of-factly. Joham let out a deep breath and looked over towards the Gondorian. The slight look of satisfaction in his brown eyes did not set well with the village leader.

“What items were given to you when you left the East?” Ryomer asked in a softer tone.

The sheildmaiden began to play the list through her head until her mind balked silently screaming 'NO, not again!' she stood up in strong protest, her chair falling back from the force. “Joham, why are they here?” pointing to the two men. “Why am I still here? Why didn’t you tell me who you really were?”

When she had risen Joham had shadowed her motions. Instantly he realized the errors of his approach. “Rholarowyn, I am sorry, I am not accusing you and neither are these two men,” he shot a strong authoritarian look towards Lienoril and then a gentler look back to the shieldmaiden. “Please sit down.”

Rholarowyn remained standing ignoring his request. “Joham, perhaps you did not hear his words as he tried to retreat on his horse, but I did. Let me repeat them for you." Her eyes still hurting from the sting of her friend’s death took hold of the eyes of the Gondorian and locked on. “She has dishonored herself and she failed in the East, and now I find out she, she, and those animals have produced a son…”

“IT IS TRUE!” Lienoril jumped to his feet. Both Eari and Ryomer were ready to intervene; it was Joham who stopped them, at least for the moment. “YOU DID FAIL IN THE EAST.”

She held her ground even though he was several inches taller than her. The unyeilding table stood between them. “AND HOW DO YOU KNOW THIS LIENORIL? WE’RE YOU THERE, ON THAT DAY 10 YEARS AGO, IN THE KING’S ASSEMBLY ROOM?”

Silence lingered uncomfortably in the air for what felt like a minute until Rholarowyn’s voice, calmer now, continued. “Only a select few were including Bandoril. The truth is you don't know what my mission was when I was sent to the East, therefore Lienoril, you do not know if I succeeded or failed.”

.

[Nayaran]

“I was a little older than you are now,” Malmiuta began, “when I became very sick, the healers could not determine the problem and I had several symptoms including a high fever. Now I was my parent's only daughter and the youngest as well, my father was very fond of me. After the mysterious sickness, I could no longer see.”

Nayaran had been watching the ground until her heard her last sentence. With a youth's compassion he looked up at the woman now nearing her 80’s. “And you never got to see again?”

“No,” she answered. “Never again…I was very sad for a long time because I could no longer do the things I once had especially the special things with my father. I was different and because of that I was afraid he no longer loved me. I would cry a lot too, especially when the other children would make fun of me. But then one day my dad decided to take me out for a walk like he used too, only on this day we went slower. He would stop and let me touch the rough bark of the trees and the dried leaves that crunched in my hand and smelled of autumn. Sometimes he would help me feel the soft, velvet pedals of a sacred, sweet scented flower that only grew in the autumn time. Then we would turn into the wind and I would listen as it whispered stories and softly caressed my face. I will never forget this day…when he helped me to learn of the world in this new way.”

“Did your father die?”

“Yes he did eventually, but not until many years later.” She answered.

“Do you still miss him?”

“Sometimes, though not as much as I used too. See Nayaran, there are times when I want to share something with him and he’s not here, that saddens me, but, there are other times when I remember special times with him, like that day, and then I am grateful that he was my father.”

“Did people hate your father?” He asked looking back down at the ground hiding his eyes.

Malmiuta leaned forward and reached out. “Nayaran, would you please take my hand?” The young boy slowly grasped the old woman’s hand and she gently pulled him up. Soon he was standing eye level to her. “There will always be some that will hate your father, and sadly there will be some that will hate you too…not because of who you are, but because of who they think you are. Some may feel threatened, some may blame you for things you’ve never done, and some may believe you are like all the other men from the East, but you are not! We are all different, but your dark skin and black hair, like your father's, do not mean you are a bad person or any less of a human being. That is not who you are. Who I am is in here,” she then pointed to her chest, “and who you are is in here,” she then pointed to his. “I believe your differences will make you stronger, but I also believe your differences mean you will face more challenges. Just remember who you are in here.” She finished pointing to his chest again. “Not who other's say you are.”

Nayaran looked down at his hands embraced in the old woman’s hands. They were wrinkled and leathery, but he could see the wisdom within the folds of her skin. It was not a conscious understanding, but deeper, like a feeling with knowledge. He remained lost in those moments until Malmiuta words broke the silence.

“Enough of this serious conversation, this is a joyous night. Nayaran, please tell me what is going on now. Who is dancing with whom, who has had too much ale, and which of the men are trying to make the bonfire grow taller?”

.

[Rholarowyn]

It had been almost 10 years ago, just after the Festival outside the walls of Minas Tirith that Rholarowyn had last seen her friend Eari. The day had been filled with an unusual air of tension and apprehension. By the evening friendships would be divided, alliances severed, and vows broken. Just as her half-elfish warrior friend had said earlier on this night, Rholarowyn too was wrestling with her own inner demons back then and had the shieldmadien known then that a decade of years would have passed before she saw her warrior sister again, the evening might have ended differently.

Eari’s fate had taken her away from the White City and not long afterwards Rholarowyn’s fate was decided by others as well. Through her bloodlines she was a descendent of the Steward’s House and at the time her connections with a few prominent men from the East had made her the next reasonable choice. It was to be a diplomatic mission for the King of the West with the Great Leader of the East; a mission that was designed, at least for all appearances, to be one of reparation for the atrocities committed against the West during the War of the Ring. Had Eari not been sent away, she would have been the more logical choice, an official representative for the King who also had close ties to the Steward’s House, she had spent time in the East prior to and just after the Great War. However, on the day the small group gathered in the King’s assembly room there were only 5 men, Rholarowyn, and the King.

Bandoril, Captain of the Pelargir Guards, had been there, as had Bryttar representing the Mithril Knights. Her cousin, Faramir had also been present along with the King and two of his personal advisors. Unbeknown to all but one of the men present, there was another plan being initiated under the deception of reconciliation. One of the King’s personal advisors, the one who always stood at the ruler’s right side, had another allegiance. There was still an undercurrent of animosity and antipathy present in both lands by those who did not want to see peace attained or resolution achieved. However, at the same time there was another mission, a third one of great importance and secrecy that was only known by Rholarowyn and the King.

Once on her way, the shieldmadien and her seven well armed escorts from the King’s court and army entered the Eastern lands easily and met up with 12 warriors of the desert, representatives from the Great Leader. It was not until the large group was well into the heart of the desolate dunes that the planned ambush took place. Blood was shed on sands of the East including Rholarowyn’s. It had been a wicked battle of evil forces bent on destroying the ambassadors from the West and those who sided with them. Bloodied and torn uniforms along with personal belongings were eventfully returned to the King with a solemn note from the Great Eastern Leader. A procession of noble desert horses were delivered along with large bags of Gold, all in attempt to convey his serious condolences for what had happened to the King’s official convoy. They had never reached the Eastern Leader’s palace.

Shortly afterwards there had been a funeral ceremony for the 7 men and the shieldmadien. Placed into the heart of the earthen rectangle was her uniform, now free of the dried blood that had once covered the garment, and her beloved sword, a gift from her cousin Boromir. Both were gently laid to rest deep within the grave. With no body to bury, the representative items, along with small offerings from friends, family, and strangers were buried under the blanket of soft Gondorian dirt just as the glowing, golden sun set below the western hill. A tombstone was made and engraved and rested at the head of her grave. Quietly one day slipped into another and life moved on for those who were still among the living, both within the walls of the White City as well as the outstreched lands beyond.

.

[Rholarowyn]

Lienoril’s eyes narrowed and his voice contained an eerie edge, “Woman, you don’t know what I know…”

“ENOUGH!” Joham commanded.

Rholarowyn and the Gondorian’s eyes did not move, each starring the other down. Finally Lienoril broke into a sly grin. “Perhaps Joham now is the time.” He then reached into his traveling tunic and pulled out a stack of worn, folded papers wrapped by a narrow leather cord. With an air of superiority he tossed it onto the rustic table. With a thud it landed directly in front of the standing woman.

In an instant Ryomer was on his feet and grabbed his friend by the shoulder. “That was not a wise move.” Though the Gondorian was taller Ryomer shoved him down in such a way that Lienoril gave in and dropped back into his seat.

“Rholarowyn, wait!”

The shieldmaiden hesitated for a moment and then picked up the small pile.

“Please,” Joham almost pleaded. “Yes there are things you need to know, things that have been kept from you…but those,” He pointed to the bundled notes in her hand, “Those are not the way to learn...”

“If not by these,” the shieldmadien stated raising her arm up and tightening her grip, “Then Joham, what is the best way for me to learn…tonight!”

The town leader sighed. “Alright,” he sat down. “You are correct, I am not just only a town baker but I suspect Ryomer already filled you in this. Why you are here? We felt it best you remained until we could get more help…and these two, well they were ordered to protect you.” He then looked at the Gondorian, “though I doubt the wisdom of the one who sent you!”

“Why Joham, why do I need protection now. I did what they wanted, Elbren, the Mithril Knights in Mirkwood, and the elves there, we took care of this. It was supposed to be over; finished. The Powers of the East have what they wanted.”

“No Rholarowyn” Ryomer began, “What happened to you in the East, there were other forces behind it. Forces we’ve only recently come to understand. It is true you met the leader’s demands after leaving their lands, but that is not where the problem is now.”

Her mind tried to absorb the implications of what the Rohirrim was saying when her legs suddenly gave out and she fell back into her chair. The small bound crumpled papers slipped from her hands an onto the floor while the room remained quiet. The shieldmaiden's voice finally broke the silence. “Is it Nayaran, is that what they want?”

“No, it is not him.” Joham answered quickly. “Rholarowyn, perhaps it is best if we start from the beginning.” The town leader then turned to the other woman in the room. “Earendil, do have the letter from the King?”

.

[earendil81]

The anger, almost hatred, lingered in the room and Lienoril was all but disrespectful. She cared not for the East, the Valar knew. Too much blood was shed by the Easterlings before and during the war in Gondor and in Dale. Had Lothlorien not faced the assault of the East as well? So many had fallen there too of the Galadhrim during the war of the Ring. Still she was tempted to hit the Gondorian even though he was now unarmed. Mistakes were made; was he such a righteous man with no fault that he could speak to another person this way? And she could sense her friend's distress as if it were her own... she was even surprised that Rhoe should react that way to the notion that her child might be taken away from her. She was not sure she would be so calm or resigned.

And what mission had Rhoe been sent to? She knew Rhoe was sent to the East; she blamed the king for her friend's untimely death. A heated discussion happened; why was she not invited to the council that saw her warrior sister sent to her demise? She was in the North then, sent away on a mission of her own. He at least had the decency to acknowledge he did so on purpose. Elessar did not want the bond shared between the two women to come before duty. Such contempt she felt then as she answered that her sense of duty killed Boromir. He had not understood until then what or who she was before the war. In any event, she had been sent to the North and Rhoe to the East. And according to Lienoril it seemed both of them failed.

Well she did not need the Gondorian to know she had not carried her duty to the end and no matter the excuse it was yet another failure added to an already long list. From what she knew no one had died, but who could say that the ramifications of her not seeing this through had not brought about some dire events to some people? Instead she gave birth to twins in Rohan and days turning into weeks, into months and years, she had started and led another life. She had not resented not being included in major decision since the children's coming, but here, now unable to understand how she could be of help to her warrior sister she enjoyed it not at all.
"Eärendil, do you have the letter from the King?"

"Which one?" she was tempted to answer in defiance. And yet, there could only be one; one she was ordered never to leave out of her sight, to carry at all times until she met the person who was supposed to receive it. She was not to trust it to anyone but the one individual who would know her real name. Her name of all things!! Even now, it angered her; she had all but forsaken that name and had mentioned it to the father of her children only once. With him, there were now only a handful of people in Middle Earth who knew that name and most of them were elves. Even Rhoe had no knowledge of it. And Joham was no elf; she was not sure she would trust her true name to people who would act in the... who was she kidding? Protecting people without their knowledge, acting in the dark was all she ever did as a Ranger in the North.
"There was a token to be given before this letter can be unsealed," she said coolly.

Joham nodded. "I thought you would ask that. I was told it might not be wise to give it in front of witnesses."
She smiled nodding. "So you know what this is?"
"I have not opened it so you can see for yourself that it was not stolen or gained by deceit."
Out of his pocket he picked out an envelope that was sealed with the arms of the Mithril Knights and the king's mark too. Joham handed it to her.
"Will you do the honour?"
"I would imagine it best you open it Joham as I know what should be here."
She gave the letter back and her dagger, which he used to break the seal. He looked at the paper an eyebrow raised slightly.
"Is that a name?"
He showed her and she nodded. "In the old language yes."
"Yours?" She shook her head. "Not for a long time. I became Eärendil when I was 13; that name stayed behind except for a short period of time. In the East as it happens; it was a mistake. So it should remain in the past for now."

She retrieved the envelope that she had carried along the way; it was not in the best of shapes, but who could complain? The seal was intact though and Joham again broke it as she was saying.
"It seems he is still keeping me in a dark. I feel like the child I was when he gave me to the elves of Lothlorien saying nothing of what I should expect. Is there anything I should know?" she added bitterly. "Some sort of ghost of the past coming for me too?"

She realized as she said it that she was only half-joking. A name forgotten, Lienoril and the ghost of Bandoril, Rholarowyn coming back from the dead. Why would Elessar send her here at this particular time if it had nothing to do with her; Rhoe being at the heart of this might be a reason but not a sufficient one. He already decided years ago that he could tear them apart, why bring them together now? In truth, did he even know?

[Rholarowyn]

Joham was now standing at the head of the table. The room held an eerie stillness as he began to read aloud...

Dear Rholarowyn,

If you are hearing these words then I am finally able to personally express my gratitude for your willingness to embark on a mission no man would agree to. I will forever be grateful for your attempt and in no way has my respect for you lessened because of the outcome. My heart was filled with more grief than words can express when I received the news of your death and no news was more welcomed when Elbren privately shared the information you were alive and safe in Mirkwood.

Through what you confidentially shared with Elbren, I have spent the last two years verifying and confirming that which you reported. It is important that I share with you all that Bandoril is alive and well and I received much of this confirmation from him. Rholarowyn, it was Bandoril who first heard you might be alive in the East though he made no mention of it to me for many years. On his own initiative he resigned his position, Captain of the Pelagir Guards and ventured into the East with a small team of men. Once there he was met with an ultimatum, continue alone or abandoned his quest. He chose the former though he understood this meant deceiving many of his death.

Bandoril personally sends his apologies for this necessary deception, especially to those present now who were with him when this event occurred. It has been imperative for this information to be kept secret until the proper time. While in the East he was able to learn of you Rholarowyn, your whereabouts, and the duties of which you were participating though he told no one. He made no attempt to contact or expose you to any unnecessary risk. Instead he went on to assist others with similar philosophies to the group you were working with.


Joham halted and slowly returned to his seat. His eyes stared at the handwritten words while his mind tried to grasp the implications of their meaning, Bandoril alive...Bandoril training Easterlings...Rholarowyn TRAINING Easterlings! Even HE did not know of these details.

Eventually he set aside the first page and continued on.


When I sent you to the East I now know that the King had no desire for peace or reconciliation though he played the role well. You were a pawn to be toyed with. I now understand that the mission I sent you on could not be accomplished under any circumstance. Yet, when you were captured by those who deceived us and then rescued from their ironclad grasp, a new day dawned for all who desire peace.

There is more I wish to tell you but that will need to wait, perhaps on the day when we meet again. For now you need to know that in the last two years since you left the East much information has been kept from you for your safety and that of your son’s. The forces in the remote desert lands, which you helped to train, have grown stronger. They have recently banded together with others in the East and they have asked for our help.

Rholrowyn and Earendil, you both have a detailed understanding of the East, their lands, their history, and their culture. I need this knowledge and because of this, you are both in danger. I also know your warrior skills are not what they once were. We do have some knowledge of the opposition’s presence here in our lands, and they do not all have dark skin and black hair. The two men I have sent can be trusted to protect you. They have greater skills than most and have pledged to ensure your lives for theirs.

Within in the next 24 hours I need you all to attend you your preparations and then depart by nightfall. Take the back roads and do not stop in any towns along the way. You need to press on towards Rohan where you will receive further information. You will meet with a messenger there in the abandoned ranch house of Ryomer’s Grandmother. Earendil and Rholarowyn, once again I need your help.

I thank you all for allegiance in this important matter.

King Elessar

.

[earendil81]

She was listening to the King's letter in utter disbelief. She could feel her pulse accelerate as anger suffused her entire being. Not only had the King known that Rhoe was alive but also of her whereabouts and he had not felt it necessary to let her family know even in secret. And he had set her in the middle of a game she was no longer ready to play.
Her knowledge of the East was putting her in danger. What danger? And what knowledge? She had not gone to the East for a long time and she had no desire at all to revisit the memories of Rhûn or Harad.

The deception cut deep; she had not been meant to reach Tharbad this year. She'd thought this was where the letter was expected but it appeared she'd been wrong. He was moving her like one moves a pawn on a checkerboard. She also was expecting to be home soon.
"No." She said simply, her voice cutting the stunned silence that had followed the reading.

Lienoril seemed to snap out of some shock; his face was ashen, joy probably fighting anger and surprise to hear his brother had played such a painful trick on him. What brother pretends to be dead and does not see fit to let his kin know? Ryomer seemed equally surprised although not stony faced. As for Rhoe, well there was no way to tell what the shieldmaiden was feeling. Probably a lot of what was going on in her own mind and yet... Then again. Maybe not.

"What do you mean Captain?" Joham asked. She laughed bitterly.
"Oh... Captain now, smoothly done. No. Just no." she was trying to control her voice, but she was shaking slightly. "He can't do this. That..." she could do nothing but to point at the letter. "is not happening. My skills may not be what they were but neither have I become a simpleton. Is this why he mentioned my children?"
Her hand moved towards Lienoril who barely seemed to notice the accusatory gesture. "To make sure I was aware that there is a threat against them? Blackmail really? I had not thought he was sunk so low as to threaten his own kin. I am going to Rohan for sure. But not for that, not for him. I will be with my family and do what I have to to protect them. But the East..." She shuddered.

Someone put a comforting hand - or at least one that was meant to be - on her arm; Ryomer. She jerked it away. "Don't!" She stepped away from them. "He is not doing this. Has he forgotten? I haven't. Has he told you Joham of the words associated to the name you carried along with you? Did he tell you why I gave it up?" She renounced the name a long time ago when she was but a child in the counting of both men and elves, but had sworn never to answer to it again after Rine went West. And so she spoke slowly.
"But in the East she'll end
Should she choose the latter
And what was broken then
Shall decide what happens to her."

She turned away. Even Rhoe had never heard this.
"Once there were words; in truth they were only words. But they have held true in my life. The East holds nothing but darkness for me. And I left it behind. I will go to Rohan but I cannot go farther."

[Rholarowyn]

“Earendil,” The Rohirrim began knowing he needed to earn the trust of this woman. “I do not believe the King wants you or Rholarowyn to return to the East. He will not risk another suicide mission with two of his most dutiful female warriors. But you both know about the East in ways we do not. That can help us help them. We need to get you both closer to the King for your protection as well as for the information you can provide.”

“But how do you know!?!” Rholarowyn stood up in protest. “Earlier Bandoril was dead, now he’s alive? Yesterday I was dead to Earendil and today I am alive? And you!” she pointed to Lienoril, “First you attack me and now I learn you are supposed to protect me?”

Joham too had been trying to account for the Gondorian’s behavior towards the sheildmaiden; he could only come up with one conclusion. “Lienoril,” he tone was matter of fact. “What orders ARE you under regarding Rholarowyn?”

Suppressing a conflicting web of his own overwhelmed emotions, Lienoril’s sense of duty kicked in as he rose to his feet, now all were standing. He then gave the shieldmaiden the old formal salute of a soldier to Gondor. “Rholarowyn, I am sorry for my behavior this evening, but there are some who have concerns for your current mental and emotional state as a warrior and I was instructed to find out your limits. I was under orders to test you. The small packet of letters I threw down, that is what’s discussed there.”

Reaching down she picked the small bundle up from the floor. “Is it true Joham?” Her grip upon the corded papers tightened as she raised them into the air. “Are there those, including the King, who are questioning my abilities and alliances? It that why I was kept isolated in Mirkwood for so long, and why others were not told I was alive? Was it really for my protection?”

“Rholarowyn,” Joham began using a calming voice. “After an 8 year absence in the East, after thinking you have been killed, one day you appear at the Mithril Knight Guild House in Mirkwood. Considering the circumstance of your disappearance we had to verify. You, who once made a vow to Gondor, to protect her with your life and to put that duty above all else, even intimate personal relationships. You arrive and admit to marrying an Easterling as well as having two children of Easterling descent in tow; of course we had to question your allegiances.”

His words pierced her heart like a cruel, jagged knife as she slipped back into the chair. Within her grasp was the physical evidence of her honor, her integrity, being questioned and her eyes stared at the pack. Tears threatened to expose the tender wound of her fellow soldiers uncertainty as to who she was, what she fought for, and what she had lost. Did her words now mean so little in a land she once called home? Yet somewhere deep inside her soul a spark flickered and her mind sensed it. Purpose and reason, reality and commitment, acted as fuel until her spirit was ignited.

“No Joham!” She then rose defiantly to her feet and tossed the lettered bundle upon the table in front of him. “If other’s questioned and still question my allegiance to Gondor then that is their choice, though it is not a wise one. Everything I reported to Elbren when I first arrived was true and if you all needed two years to determine the facts then you all have wasted precious time.

A new silence filled the room but the shieldmaiden did not let it last long. "Do you not understand what I was doing in the East?" In her own confusion she paused and intently looked into the eyes of each of the men.

“No.” Joham finally answered somewhat contrite. “We have not been told.”

Rholarowyn turned towards Eari, within her dark eyes she could see confusion and something else, was it fear? Yet her friends eyes held firm, if no one else in this room believed in her, the shieldmaiden knew that her warrior sister did. Rholarowyn sat down and waited for the others to follow. Finally she reached deep into her tunic and produced a small silver coin about two inches in diameter. It was placed it in the middle of the table. The side that gazed up into the room had the Tree of Gondor with Seven Stars above etched into its metal.

“Many years ago, long before I was in this East, this was given as a gift to a young Easterling girl by a female warrior from the West. The girl’s name was Shara, and it was meant to inspire hope. Most of the women in the East had no say in their own lives. Their fate was determined by men. Some men are kind, but as you know, many in that land are not. Their cultural beliefs that women are to be subservient to them and their desires runs deep and many abuses occur. The women were expected to endure this way of life that consisted of battles and wars that would kill their husbands, brothers, and sons; a life that when they were taken captive by warring tribes they were subjected to unspeakable cruelty and mistreatment. This is the life they were expected to accept, that others, men, controlled their fate.”

Pausing for a moment the shieldmaiden collected her thoughts and continued. “I spent close to five years helping to train women to become warriors. Not because they wish to fight men but because that is the only way they will be heard and respected in their culture. I helped them to find their voice in a language the men there understand so ultimately they would have control over their own destinies. They desire peace and healing for the land that has known bloodshed for too long…but now they are willing and capable to fight for it.”

Reaching out, Rholarowyn the pushed the coin towards Eari with her finger. “My friend, I do not understand the meaning of the words you just spoke, but I do know this, your time in the East many years ago inspired a change in the thinking of one young girl and from that, a revolution grew.”

.

[earendil81]

Things were spinning too fast... she did not understand. Maybe it had been too long since she was caught up in the middle of a maelstrom such as this. Maybe it was beyond her abilities now. The pieces of the puzzle were scattered and she was having trouble putting them together.

Obviously and despite Lienoril's previous affirmation, the King was behind their presence here. Gondor was a part of the puzzle; the East also, this much too did not require too much cleverness. Bandoril and Rholarowyn were in the centre of this and Lienoril, Joham and Ryomer somewhere in the outskirts along with Eryn Lasgalen where Rhoe had been hidden. And if Elbren was involved, it was more than likely that Elrond's sons or Celeborn in Imladris knew part of the story. But where did she fit in?

She could see why Rholarowyn's reappearance after eight years would raise questions; but what if that had been her task? Married to an Easterling and with two children; that was surprising. And where was the second child? She was concerned then... there were things she knew she'd do today to protect her children that she would not have done then. Yet, she also knew her friend's heart; the heart of a woman who had defied Denethor by not revealing that Earendil was a girl, risking her guardian's wrath after she was banished from Minas Tirith. Rholarowyn would not betray her soul. And it belonged to Gondor; it had ever been so, at least since she had become friend with the girl back when they were both merely entering womanhood, and both denying it.

She met her warrior sister's eyes then; she might not understand how Rholarowyn could find it in her heart to forgive, how she could marry a man of the East after the sufferings they inflicted upon their land, but neither had she lived among them for that long. And she would not judge her friend's choice. She also knew that whatever Rhoe was doing in the East and whatever choice she made, she would not relinquish her allegiance to the White Tower even for love. Neither would she. But she was afraid; it would be ridiculous of her to deny it. Afraid because she was not home and had no idea of how deep the plot went and how it could affect her loved ones. And because she still could not understand what piece of the puzzle she was.

Finally as she sat down, Rhoe pulled out a silver coin from her tunic. It was a common coin, not unlike any one might have found in Gondor and yet it looked old and battered, its edge eroded and turned slightly green. And then her friend told a story that was all too familiar. So part of it made sense and she was fitting in that puzzle.

“My friend, I do not understand the meaning of the words you just spoke, but I do know this, your time in the East many years ago inspired a change in the thinking of one young girl and from that, a revolution grew.”

She laughed softly; it was not funny and yet it was considering the trail of thoughts she'd followed earlier how not seeing a mission to its end could have unforeseen consequences.
She caressed the coin softly; if she remembered well the other side would be holding the winged crown of Gondor and some markings that were already all but gone when she gave the coin away. She turned it in her hand; yes, these were the markings. She sighed and met her friend’s gaze once more.

"Do you recall Rhoe what happened when I came back to Gondor after I was banished?" It was not really requiring an answer but her friend nodded. "Denethor's way of testing my loyalty was to send me away... again. I was in Minas Tirith merely a few weeks before he sent me to the East."

She was playing with the coin looking at her hands and then at Joham.
"It's true what she said you know. Battles and wars kill their men; it also defines them. And strength is what determines power in many tribes. You could be a woman and strong, but what the men endure to be recognized... well women are not supposed to go through it. They can be wives, sisters or slaves. Not warriors." She paused.

"We could not understand how different we were and we went in like blind men. Anoriel who lived in Harad in his youth looked as if he belonged and they welcomed him up to a certain point. He knew from the moment we arrived that our task was doomed and he begged me to go back. We could not be expected to achieve anything. He was speaking true: Sauron's hand was visible everywhere; dark men serving Barad Dur or Morgul had more power than anyone and whispered in the ears of the tribe leaders poisonous words against the White Tower. Still I wanted to stay longer, at least gather some understanding of this culture and of their ways in war. At least we could bring this back. We were left alone for a couple of weeks but not long enough; this eye colour is not common in the West, it is even less in the East. When it became obvious I had attracted too much attention I told him to go away and wait for me. He was not happy at all but we knew that dying would do nothing so he left. And for that one time being a woman was helpful; it was against everything I knew not to fight them when they captured me. But I let them do it."

She looked at Rholarowyn.
"I remember Shara; I did not know her name though. She was a child, maybe in her early teens I think. But she was considered a woman as she had bled already. And she was a furiously independent soul. She made me think of you in a way. She had a purpose, or she was trying to find one in her life and she helped me a lot in there. She taught me a lot of their ways; she made it possible for me to disappear amongst them. And so for a while they seemed to forget me for a while and I could learn a lot. I do not believe the “Master” was aware of my presence and they probably thought me just as harmless as their wives. I used their complacency and Shara’s willingness to help. When I finally met the one who had power I had a couple of knives of my own. He died, along with the two men who were guarding the room; Shara saw it all." She sighed. "I wished she had not. She was too young for that violence and yet she was brought up to it. She asked me to bring her with me and I did; it would have been dishonorable not to do it after she helped me so. I disguised myself in one of the guards' uniform but she was the one who guided me out and to the place where Anoriel was waiting for me. I do not know to this day how she found him and he never said. It seemed to be her own rebellion; to thank her for saving my life, I gave her this.”

[Rholarowyn]

“No, no, no…” Lienoril rose and paced a few feet as he emerged from his own inner thoughts before turning around. Joham prepared himself for another revolt as Lienoril was the third to recently exclaim this word.

“Bandoril is alive AND training females to become warriors?” The Gondorian then looked up and over to the two women sitting across the table. His perplexity could not be missed. “He would never…I mean he…well other than you two…he didn’t agree with…doesn’t agree with training women for battle…he would never do this, willingly train women into warriors…Joham!” he then turned to the leader, “what do you know of this?”

“Lienoril, I knew nothing of these details until tonight. I did not know he was alive and I certainly did not know that anyone was being trained,” Joham then looked towards Rholarowyn, “or was doing any training in the East.”

Joham too was perplexed. Though there was distance between his land and that of the White City, the King had always kept him apprised in the happenings of Middle Earth, especially those that concerned the East. If peace was to be kept in all of the lands after the war, there were those who needed to ensure it continued.

“But you are the leader of the Knights of the Northmen, how could you not know?” He blurted out in frustration.

“Knights of the Northmen..." Rholarowyn said slowly looking from Eari to the Rohirrim. “The Knights of the Northmen no longer exist. They were annihilated more than 20 years ago.”

The Gondorian awkwardly cursed under his breath.

Joham shook his head slightly before he spoke. “Lienoril, please, sit down. It was suggested I tell them anyway.” The town leader then turned to the two women. “There is something you should know, especially if a civil war is brewing in the East. But before I go further I need affirmations from you both that what is shared here will be held in the strictest of confidence. It will not go beyond these walls and neither of you will discuss it with anyone other than the three of us, Bryttar, Elbren, or Malmiuta. If ever asked, unless by the King and only if you are alone with him, you will deny any knowledge of this. Do I have your sworn word?”

Both female warriors agreed.

“Rholarowyn and Earendil, what I am about to tell you is beyond confidential. It is true that the Knights of the Northmen were basically destroyed many, many years ago. But for some, me included, there was a remnant still in training. We were not allowed out on missions or to engage in battles, we were not ready. But, when the last of the Knights were slaughtered by those in the East, all believed it was the end.”

Joham went on to explain how the trainees eventually found Malmiuta, whose father was one of the chief Knights before he died in battle. In her possession were documents going back a hundred years or so. They contained history, codes of conduct, training regimens, and battle plans for the Knights of the Northmen. The town leader shared the Knights history and how this information was presented to the King Elessar once he took the throne. Joham further explained the plan which was devised for the reforming this group of elite warrior soldiers. They were to be men, no women, and they were to be of the utmost in courage, character, and fighting skills. Finally Joham went on to give details how by design there were to be no known ties or connections to the King, though secretly they were under his authority. But if ever asked they would deny being under any orders of the King. They were to be a secret group and trained for extremely dangerous or delicate missions where large armies would not be wise or beneficial. During this time Ryomer also filled in the details of how they were to appear as men with trade skills but nothing unique or obscure. They were just to blended in with a local town or village unless they were on a mission of stealth. Towards the end Lienoril also added two significant points which he thought the women should know. It was almost an hour later when Joham finally concluded.

The two female warriors remained silent for some time as this news just added to an already surreal night. Eventually the shieldmaiden spoke up. “Joham, why did you share this with us?”

“Rholarowyn,” he began sincerely, “I do not know why I was not informed of your activities in the East or of Bandoril being alive, but I do know this, both Elbren and the King wanted you here until we could provide protection for you, Nayaran, and Earendil. If they both felt the three of you needed our guard then each of you must have a significant part in whatever is going on. I suspect there may be a threat looming that even the King does not understand.”

.

[earendil81]

The feeling that all was moving too fast overwhelmed her once more. The Knights of the Northmen now; soon an elf would appear to reveal that Gil Galad did not fall during the battle of Dargorlad...

And so as Rholarowyn she learned of this order of knights that was destroyed two decades before because they were a menace to Saruman and once he had a spy in place in Edoras, it had been the first thing that he worked at. The Northmen were come before the Eothed and they were faithful not to the king but to the people, there to protect them, in the same way as the Rangers had protected the North. Whether its members were condemned under accusation of treachery or killed in circumstances that warranted no questioning, they had disappeared. But apparently not completely.

Eventually her friend asked the question that was also burning her lips. “Joham, why did you share this with us?”

“Rholarowyn,” the man answered. “I do not know why I was not informed of your activities in the East or of Bandoril being alive, but I do know this, both Elbren and the King wanted you here until we could provide protection for you, Nayaran, and Earendil. If they both felt the three of you needed our guard then each of you must have a significant part in whatever is going on. I suspect there may be a threat looming that even the King does not understand.”

There was another heavy silence, filled with doubt and speculation about what the threat could be. But in truth there was only one important thing just yet.

"What of my family Joham? You talk of my safety, but it appears that there are many reasons why I should worry about theirs. I have no doubt Herger can look after our children and would bring as many as he could into the halls of Mandos but if they are as dangerous as you appear to fear, then I can linger no more. I have to be on my way and make sure they are all well."

She looked at all three of them and received no answer; either there was no one who was sent to protect her loved ones or they did not know who it was. Or maybe they wonder how she would react if they refused her. She could probably count on Bryttar being with Herger but Rylar was due soon and he would want to be with her. There were many possibilities none of which she liked. There was no time to waste. Or so it felt...

"I have no need for sleep; I know you probably will so by your leave I shall be on my way and you can catch up. Or maybe one of you feels awake enough to accompany me?"

[Rholarowyn]

‘HERGER!’ Rholarowyn’s mind screamed at the name. Shaking her head her mind replayed the words “I have no doubt Herger can look after our children and…” Of all of the strange things she’d learn tonight this was one of the hardest to accept. Herger, her cousin, who was always looking for a woman, or two, to warm his bed and THIS was the father of Eari’s children? But a determined female voice drew her attention back to the room.

"I have no need for sleep; I know you probably will so by your leave I shall be on my way and you can catch up. Or maybe one of you feels awake enough to accompany me?"

“I do not recommend that.” Joham answered solemnly. “It would not be wise for the five of you to separate at this time. Earendil if it were just you adults I would agree, leave tonight, but there is a child and he at least needs time to prepare. If there were any threat to your family I am sure the King would have dispatched protectors to them.”

“Rholarowyn…”Ryomer spoke up. “Your note from Bryttar, perhaps there is information about this in his letter.”

The shield maiden gathered her thoughts and then removed the traveled letter from her tunic. The smell of Rohan filled the air around her. With her small blade she sliced open the contents and then began to silently read.

“He speaks of Bandoril being alive,” the shield maiden reported then returned to her reading.

A rhythmic knock came from the locked wooden door. It was the same knock that Chugg had used earlier to permit her entrance with Ryomer. Joham left the room.

“Bryttar was a Knight of the Northman before he became a Mithril Knight?” Rholarowyn asked looking up from Bryttar’s written words. Ryomer nodded in affirmation. Slowly she moved the first page aside and began to read the second. As she reached the end of the page she looked over to her warrior sister. “They were going to Minas Tirith though it doesn’t say why.”

Eari quickly asked. “What exactly did he write?”

Rholarowyn began to read. “Rylar is heavy with child and while I wish for our child to be born in Rohan we are traveling to Minas Tirith by tomorrow’s first light. Herger has agreed to accompany me…” She paused for a moment leaving out the part where Bryttar explained how Herger had changed and fatherhood suit him well. “…we hope to be there no more than one moon’s cycle.” A few more moments passed and then she folded the letter. “There is nothing more that concerns this situation.”

Joham then entered the room. “Rholarowyn, the Lady Malmiuta has taken Nayaran to her home. She strongly requests for you and your friend to see her as soon as possible.” He then turned to Earendil, “She is a wise woman and a seer as well. Please, before you make any decisions regarding your departure will you go with Rholarowyn?”

.

[earendil81]

“Rylar is heavy with child and while I wish for our child to be born in Rohan we are traveling to Minas Tirith by tomorrow’s first light. Herger has agreed to accompany me…” her friend paused “…we hope to be there no more than one moon’s cycle. There is nothing more that concerns this situation.”

So Herger had gone to Minas Tirith. It had to mean that Rylar needed help she could not get in Rohan; the Rohirrim had always been ill at ease in cities and it would not have come easy to him.
She was grateful every time he agreed to come with her as he would usually try and weasel out of any duty involving time inside walls. He was the epitome of a free man in that - one who blossomed in the countryside - and cities probably felt like prison to him. She could understand that and the many ways this need not to be bound had expressed itself in the past. And so she found she was worried for Rylar. Another incentive to leave just then, even though Joham had spoken true. Nayaran at least needed the rest before traveling such a distance but it was going against the urge every fiber of her being felt.

“Rholarowyn, the Lady Malmiuta has taken Nayaran to her home. She strongly requests for you and your friend to see her as soon as possible.” the baker turned to her then. “She is a wise woman and a seer as well. Please, before you make any decisions regarding your departure will you go with Rholarowyn?”

She could not bite back the retort although she did try to soften it.
"I doubt her vision goes beyond what elves can see, but I will meet her. For Nayaran's sake and Rhoe's."

She would not want to worry Rholarowyn about Rylar's condition; her friend had already much to think of and it seemed the news that were conveyed tonight had taken their toll on her warrior sister. She could not deny all of it was hard to swallow and understand for her too, but what Rhoe had that she had not was her son.
And right now, she wanted to be with her loved ones. She could not forget she lost some before because she was not where she should have been and no matter how reasonable Joham wanted her to be, there were fears that were hard to put to rest. She promised herself when Herger welcomed the children in his life that she would not leave him alone and be away from them should anything befall them and here she was... away. It did not settle well with her and her body felt tense with the need to leave. She would follow and meet the seer but she could not promise she would listen to what she had to say.

[Rholarowyn]

The noise of the evening’s festivities had died long ago and only the sounds of crickets and frogs could be heard through the opened windows of the old woman’s steadfast house. A cool breeze entered gently and passed through the room catching the loose threads of weavings which hung around upon the walls. The glasses upon the small table were empty as the three women sat silent. Two books were opened upon the table cloth and one was pushed to the side.

For Rholarowyn, the night had been filled with conflicting emotions from learning of Bandoril’s death and then that he lived, fighting a Gondorian man who seemed twice her size, meeting her warrior sister and then learning that she had born Herger three children, and then that their lives might be in danger. But Malmiuta had brought the two women some sense of relief in reassuring that they and their loved ones were not under no immediate threat. To Joham and the two other men the evidence and lack of knowledge pointed to that as a logical conclusion, but she and Eari had just spent hours learning from the old woman how the Knights of the Northman at one time long, long ago, admitted women as warrior/healers. She had shared their wisdom writings, their herb lore, and even some of the training protocols. All of this was stored deep in her mind as she could not read the very books which contained the sacred knowledge.

When the Knights had reformed for this latest incarnation, Malmiuta had not let any of the men know about this aspect of the Knighthood. She alone was the keeper of the Book of Secrets for the woman and it was not to be shared until she determined the ones who it would be best to receive it. Earendil had been chosen long before Rholarowyn, but now the two were here and the elder woman was taking a chance. Exposing these two women warriors to the ancient writings and helping them to understand what she believed was their destiny.

Rholarowyn pulled one of the books in closer and looked at the words upon the page. Each letter was like a work of art curling and blending with the next. The pages were colorful kaleidoscopes, each one mesmerizing to look at much less read. She then read a passage aloud.

With darkness of time
The depth falls into the mist
Swiftly the abyss screams

With passage of time
The lost depths reemerge
Finders of the way

“It is no accident you have read these words Rholarowyn.” The old woman whispered. “It is you and Earendil I have chosen and the King has agreed, which is why he has provided protection. ” Her blind eyes stared off but her voice was addressing both of the warriors. “He and I have chosen you both. The time has come for a Knighthood of women to be reborn and we wish for you to be the founders.”

.

[earendil81]

She had given the woman the time they had asked of her; and she was not convinced. Not that she believed the seer to be a liar or to try and misguide them, but she was not sure she deserved or wanted the honour, or task, that was being given.

She made a promise long before to herself and others that she would not go back to that world and she was not sure she was ready to break that promise.
There would be consequences if she did and not necessarily ones she wanted to face. It was one thing to leave once a year for a couple of months and be able to refuse if she wanted to and take on the duty and responsibility that came with what Malmutia... offered? asking... Which word should she use?

"If you will accept this, I cannot give an answer yet. I thank you for your trust and I promise you that come what may my lips are sealed on what was shared tonight. But I cannot make further promises. There are others that are involved and I would not decide without consulting with them on what this could mean."

She chuckled. "Had you come ten years ago you would have found me eager to help and join, more than you know. I'd have done anything for a chance at what you offer today. But things changed. The world is changed. The elves are gone from our shores and they more than any other kinds knew that women or men were equal in all but a few things. And because of these I am changed too, and I cannot do this as easily as I would have before."

When the woman did not answer right away, she turned to Rhoe and smiled. "I will wait on the morrow to leave this place; it is far too late to depart now anyway; it would be reckless. Joham would have had to know this would take long and you will probably need sleep. Mellon nin, I know you shall be ready when I am. Make sure the men are too."

She moved and reached for the door handle; she had to go back to her room and gather her belongings even though she would not sleep. And maybe Malmutia needed to think on what she had said.

[Rholarowyn]

“Sleep,” Rholarowyn whispered once the wooden door had been pulled snuggly closed. “I will not know sleep tonight.” She continued as her gaze fell hard upon the sacred books.

“I shall make you a tea, to help.” The wise women replied rising from the finely carved timber chair. The shieldmaiden’s eyes followed, as each step was taken, each movement was made with the intimate knowledge of ones own house and the items placed among it. To a common observer they would have no awareness of the elder woman’s blindness. Wisdom, ease, and grace made up her countenance. Rholarowyn’s edginess was a stark contrast to the other woman’s peace. Finally in frustration she pushed the chair away from the table and racking her hair with her right hand, she began to pace the room.

Malmiuta's attention remained on preparing the tea until finally it was ready. Returning to her chair, she placed the small clay pot upon the table and returned to her seat. The feelings of agitation continued to grow in the younger woman.

“What is distressing you so?”

Rholarowyn turned sharply. The heat in her blood was growing as the anger began coursing through her veins. “This!” she answered with a fury throwing her arm towards the table, “and that!” her other arm whipped around towards the door, “and tonight!”

Her fiery eyes stopped at the elder woman’s stare, which penetrated right into Rholarowyn’s soul. Momentarily there were bound by some unknown force, frozen in time until one single word entered the shieldmaiden’s thoughts…”GO!”

In a whirl she was out the door with her sword in hand. Quickly she made her way through the dark to the small bunkhouse behind Joham’s main house knowing he would be there. With her empty hand she grabbed the lantern from the iron pole that offered a small amount of light upon the porch. Without missing a step stealthily she was through the unlocked door. Acquiring her target who was in the bed on the left, she unsheathed her sword and placed its sharp tip up to the flesh of his throat.

“What th… !” the startled man sprung up, though still seated upon the straw matress, as he tried to make sense of the shadows. He immediately stopped when the flesh of his neck met the cold, piercing point of the sword. Instinctively he pushed back toward the wall which allowed the light, linen sheet to fall to his waist and exposed his bare dark haired chest to the night air.

“Lienoril,” her voice was as cold as her blade, “you wish to test me? You test me now!”

The Gondorian was clearly confused and shot a quick look over to Ryomer who after rubbing his eyes appeared equally baffled. Yet the blade upon Lienoril’s neck did not budge. Ryomer stood up long enough to realize his predicament and made a fast shift in direction to grab his sheet. With his lower body now covered he attempted to take control.

“Rholarowyn…” the Rohirrim began in a soothing voice, “it is over now.”

“No Ryomer,” she shot back though her eyes were still focused on her prey. “He tests me now!”

“Rholarowyn, please if you…” the Gondorian asked cautiously, raising his right hand in defense.

“Don’t!” she stated and then took a step forward. “We will finish what you began!”

“Alright, alright,” the Gondorian nodded in agreement, “but at least let me put on my trousers.”

“I have your word?” she asked resolutely while the blade still rested upon the flesh of his neck.

“Yes, YES! You have my word!”

The shieldmaiden remained motionless for another moment, then slowly she lowered her blade. “I will meet you by the North side of the barn, there is light there.” Backing towards the door she nodded at Ryomer, turned and departed leaving behind the lantern and two stunned men. Finally Lienoril stepped out of the bed and reached for his pants.

“You aren’t going after her?”

“Yes, Ryomer, I am!!”

Soon the Gondorian had slipped on his pants, boots, and a light colored under tunic. As he approached the door he grabbed his sheathed sword.

“Lienoril, be careful, don’t hurt her!”

“Hurt her?” He looked back at his friend confused. “She had the fires of hell in her eyes; you should hope that she doesn’t hurt me!”

The Gondorian followed the path to the barn and once near the light he spotted her figure with sword pulled and ready. “Rholarowyn…we do not need to...”

The female Gondorian lunged at his first word. With her sword in hand and a renewed determination in her soul. From the first blow he deflected Lienoril knew it was not a battle of purpose or cause, though she may have believed so, the erratic thrusts, the resolute cuts through the air, the inconsistent form, no he knew she was not truly fighting him, she was fighting something deeper.

Not since the day of Boromir had she fought with such intensity. Iron striking iron, the clashing of metal blades echoed throughout the night air and still she fought on. There was no pace; there was no holding back or balancing her reserves. For now even her son was forgotten. Sweat dripped down from her forehead and dampened her tunic as every muscle throughout her body began to ache, determined she would not be defeated, not this time.

Lienoril sensed her weariness, and though he countered her attacks it was only a matter of time before she would exhaust herself. However, as she continued her assault he grew impressed with her tenacity. Her true warrior’s heart was revealing itself even if her intentions were misplaced. Finally, he slowed his own movements watching as she struggled to handle her blade with any type of finesse. Then she stopped and stood still. Face to face about 5 feet apart, her breathing was beyond rapid and her face drenched with sweat along with…tears? She held his gaze like an animal of prey about to be devoured by its predator and dropped her sword to the ground in front of him.

The Gondorian remained motionless as well, both unmoving other than the woman’s immediate need for air. Finally Lienoril reached down. The shieldmadien flinched as he did yet her feet remained firmly planted. However, her eyes watched each of his movements warily.

“You did not fail…” he said after rising, making his first attempt at a truce.

Extending his hand, which held her sword as an offering, he reached out. Slowly, hesitantly, she looked down and reclaimed her weapon by the hilt. “Rholarowyn!” he whispered waiting for her to look up. When she did he saw it again, the same look he had seen earlier in the night, during there first encounter, fear, fear mixed along with…"Rholarowyn," his voice gentler still, "it was not that kind of test."

Their eyes held only for a moment before Lienoril lowered his and resheathed his sword "Let’s go back and find Joham, or perhaps your friend Earendil.”

.

[earendil81]

If her steps were showing determination it was definitely not what she felt; oh she was determined to get to her loved ones as fast as possible, that much was true but the rest was just as tricky and confusing as quick sand. Even if she were tired and at that time she needed rest she would find no sleep this night. Come to consider Rholarowyn would probably feel the same. As she closed the door of her room behind her she sighed leaning against the wood.

There was too much at stake, too much happening; the shock of finding her friend alive was shaking her no matter how hard she tried to deny it. It was a pleasant surprise to say the least and yet it had only been the first of revelations this night that were shaking her entire world.

She could not understand how someone could entirely disappear for so long; granted some people of power had helped her friend vanish into thin air but still word could have, should have gone out of a Gondorian woman training women in the East. If not of Rhoe herself at least of what she was doing. Some tribe leaders would have heard something. There could be no other way.

She chuckled. Who was she trying to convince? She had disappeared herself entirely before the war. No one could have known where she was; Elessar had only found out after the Ring was destroyed and his throne reclaimed. But it had been another time, when messages could get lost with the servants of the enemy out there and intent on destroying the West. Still.

She should be honest with herself; she had fled that room. Partly because of Malmutia, partly because of Rhoe. Neither of them were the same and there probably was some resentment on both their side even if not voluntarily. She could not understand the child; there was no way Rhoe would betray Gondor but loving a man of the East was beyond her. So much had suffered at their hands; yet there had been Jiyadan before, and Mouhjadhin so maybe she had come to an understanding that Eari herself would never reach. She could not deny she was still wary of the East and its inhabitants. And she had not given the chance to Rhoe to discuss her own choice in love and denying that the upcoming discussion frightened her would be foolish.

There was a knock at the door that cut off her thoughts; looking around she realized she had not done much. A little bit of shuffling her books here, the sword she'd left here moved to another place. She was not really in a mood for packing either apparently.
"Yes."
"Earendil?" It was Ryomer's voice. What was he doing here and not sleeping? Then they'd tell she could not leave because they were tired... or maybe they would say nothing, they were soldiers after all.
"What? Come in." He opened the door slightly.
"You should come. Rhoe... well."
She raised an eyebrow; was he going to say?
"She challenged Lienoril and I am not sure..."
"that she knows why; and one of them might get hurt."
She grabbed her sword this time and followed the Rohirrim.

Yet when they finally reached the other two, the weapons were done and it seemed the Gondorian was ... offering comfort maybe?
"Rholarowyn?" She let her question hang. It was her friend's to decide whether to share or not. But something in her eye caught hers. Sadness, anger yes, but maybe a hint of something more: a feeling of betrayal? Maybe. And if that was it, against who?

[Rholarowyn]

The fog of exhaustion that had settled throughout the fatigued warrior’s mind was pierced by a long lost, yet familiar voice. "Rholarowyn?"

Supporting herself on the hilt of the sheathed sword in which the tip was slightly penetrating the ground, Rholarowyn’s breathing finally returned to a regular and smooth rhythm. She looked up into the eyes of her friend and the eyes of the two men. A different element of concern was apparent upon each face.

“I did NOT betray Gondor!” she finally conveyed with as much conviction as she could muster.

“Rholarowyn…” Ryomer began, “no one is saying that you…”

“NO Ryomer!” She interrupted, “I did what I had to do…to survive, in the East, I made choices, hard choices, choices that none of you may ever understand, but I made them and I survived! Then I return to these lands and I am kept hidden for two years. For MY protection they tell me…” The woman then turned to Eari seeking some form of connection with her friend from long ago. “They say it would have been better if I had left my son in the East. It would have been easier if I’d returned to these lands alone and denied his very existence. Now I am about to take him back to the places of my past, places I once called home. How am I going to protect him there?”

“Rholarowyn” The dark haired Gondorian stepped forward one pace. “Ryomer and I are commissioned to protect you AND your son. Our swords and our strength will provide it.”

The shieldmaiden rose up and stood tall in front of the man. Looking up into his dark eyes she repeated his words from earlier, “I don’t care what her story is! She has dishonored herself! She failed in the East! And now I find out she and those animals…a son you tell me!!!” She paused only for a moment. “Lienoril, whether these are your true feelings or they were just part of the test, you are not the first to say them, and you will not be the last. Can you protect me and my son from people’s ignorant opinions and misinformed assumptions? Can you protect us from the bitterness and anger of others and the repercussions that will follow?”

The three remained silent as one lone tear finally escaped from the shieldmaiden’s eyes. She turned to go and then paused looking back at the three. “I, we, will be ready to leave by midday tomorrow...though fear I am about to take my son into a pit of vipers worse than the one I left back in the East."

With that said, Rholarowyn turned away and followed the trail back to Joham's house.

.

[earendil81]

When Rholarowyn turned she hesitated; a part of her wanted to follow her friend, another was not so certain. In fact this part took over. Although she could understand the pain coming from this feeling of being always questioned, doubted. She remembered how it was when she came back from Lothlorien before the war and how everyone treated her as if she had some sort of disease.
These few months had felt like a thousand years. More than once she had wanted to yell at these men "I am a girl, so what of it? It does not make me less of a warrior." And yet she had not; but if they had known her, they'd have understood the anger behind the lunges, the parries, the obsessive need to show them that she was as good as them, better even and until only the Stewart's son could disarm her and not without a fight.

But she also knew that it had only lasted a few months; Rhoe had been sheltered from the world for more than two years and though they said that it was for her protection, she probably felt that they doubted her story still; what felt like a thousand years to her when she was a child must be worse for the woman. And Eari could not deny that there might be reason for that doubt: there was a child born of love who was a living proof of how Rhoe had changed. She did not believe, would not even consider that Rhoe could or would betray Gondor in any way, but neither could she pretend not understanding why others would.

"Will you not go to her?" Ryomer asked, slightly subdued.
She shook her head as she whispered.
"I cannot."
"Why is it so?" asked Lienoril.
She shrugged.
"Because I am the past she left behind and whether or not I judge her, there are ghosts attached to me that she probably would feel are here to judge, or could. And because I believe she is also angry with me and I with her in a certain way."
"Why would you be angry with each other? You were ever friends. If what I heard from my brother was true, she knew who you were even before the Lord Boromir."

She nodded but said nothing at first. She started her way back to her own room and they followed suit.
"She did. When Boromir started training her I saw a chance for me to be accepted in the same way. We were friendly already and we are close of age; I sought the Captain's teachings as well and so we were often together. One day I told her my secret and we became closer. It was our secret and we were having the time of our lives for a while because there was something we knew than nobody else did. I made sure never to tell that she knew to Denethor or her cousins. My lie was not her responsibility to bear."
"That does not explain why you'd be angry."
She laughed softly.
"It appears Rho is not the only one haunted by the past tonight. Lienoril even if you did not mean what you told her, you know very well that Gondor suffered at the hands of Rhûn; even more so from Harad but the Eastern tribes did hurt us. Unlike Rhoe I was in Mordor for a while a slave under the rule of the Easterlings and I do not know that I have it in my heart to forgive that. I am angry that she could and found love there even. Or maybe I envy her, because in forgiveness there is healing for the one who grants it and that is why she could find love."

She did not think she'd ever talked that much, especially to strangers but these were also her fears, her doubts, the ones she would not raise with Rhoe just yet because she guessed her friend was just as frightened as her.
"And I imagine she is angry at me because of Herger. Or at least a part of her is. She loves him dearly you know, but she probably cannot understand how I could leave aside duty and honour for a man like him. He used to be all that we swore never to get too close to during our nocturnal escapes from the Citadel. We saw how soldiers and men were in the inns, how each night would bring a different girl and yet always end the same way. We did not want that for ourselves; Bryttar might have been more what we should aim for but the truth is that we thought of ourselves as the warrior brides of Gondor." She shrugged again. "I guess we are both angry that neither of us could remain that and now Gondor has no shieldmaiden left."

It was Lienoril's turn to shrug. "Women are too complicated."
She laughed.
"It's true I guess. Unlike men, most women don't get to follow orders. They have to navigate their lives differently especially if they do not want to just be someone's daughter and then someone's wife. But I am also of the peredhel. We tend to see things in another light, through another set of rules or understandings. Time, feelings; it all is particular. She has left the man she loved behind her and took her child with her. Whatever she feels now is overwhelming and she probably cannot see where and when it ends. For us, it is but a moment in the passing of time."
Ryomer intervened.
"But you know that you live beyond those you love."

Another shrug, and a sad smile for that. "Maybe she is also mad at me for that because she knows what Herger and I have lost and doesn't understand why we should agree to go through the loss and pain again. But I don't know, I am only thinking too much."

They had arrived to the soldier's place.
"I would leave earlier, but since she said she and Nayaran would be ready at midday, I expect you to be as well. Then we'll see how much transpires. It should be an interesting travel. Thank you for listening gentlemen."

[Rholarowyn]

Rholarowyn’s feet traveled the well known path, yet when she came to the lone pine she paused. Thoughts in her mind were racing, looping back on themselves, replaying her past. Gondor, her father’s murder, the East, Boromir, Rohan, Culinar, sword fighting, traitors, capture, torment…then Gondor and it all would start over again. Quickly she turned down the other path, away from Joham’s house. A half mile away she finally came to the spot, her spot, isolated and near the snow fed creek. Once there she began climbing the boulder and sat down upon the cool granite surface. It was there under the clear night time sky dotted with millions of little lights the shieldmaiden pondered, evaluated, the significant choices she’d made during her life all bringing her to this moment.

Each one made sense at the time, yet here with only the rocks, trees, and stars as her witnesses she confessed how her heart was still filled with such anger, hatred, regret, anxiety, resentment, and bitterness. In the past it was easy, perhaps too easy, to know the enemy. Good was the right side and bad or evil was the side to be defeated. “When did the lines get blurred?” she asked aloud. “How did I become the enemy of my own people?” she cried out to no one.

Would others ever understand? Could she make them comprehend the extent of the horror of the East? Would they ever believe that there were some of the dark skinned race who were just as horrified by the behaviors and actions of their own race and they sought out change, no they sought out a revolution to ensure change. Lying back, she now looked up into the faces of the stars, closed her eyes, and deepened her breathing. Slowing each breath down until her body complied and began to relax. Relaxation soon gave into exhaustion and Rholarowyn felt the fatigue limping through out her entire body. She was so worn-out of fighting the external battles, but also drained of fighting the internals ones as well. Life in these lands would never be the same for her, the days would never be like those of her past. He must have known that when he sent her back with their son…

’ ”Rholarowyn, you have been true and have held my heart for all these years but now I must send you and Nayaran away, you must return to your homeland. It is no longer safe here with my people, not now, my time, it has come. Promise me you will do this.” He had placed his weak hand gently upon her face to comfort her. By the glow of the small warming fire she could see his pain growing and his spirit fading in his eyes. “Take my amulet.” He then whispered. “Please.” Never was a leader’s amulet to be removed by a woman, never was she to keep it in her possession; however, he too had been a man of vision and change for his people. Slowly, gently, she reached around his neck and removed the sacred item. “Please, wear it until Nayaran reaches his 12th year, then give it to him.” The shieldmaiden placed it gingerly in his bloodied hand and she gently clasped her hands around his. There the two remained until the last few breaths were becoming more shallow. Rholarowyn leaned forward and kissed him tenderly upon his cooling lips, knowing it would be their last.’

In the distance a lone wolf cried out, it was a warning cry that brought the woman back to the present evening. The cool dampness of the boulder had infused her, shivering, she quickly stood up and reached for the small lump still hanging from her neck. Leaving her private space by the brooke, it took a brisk walk back to towards the town to get her blood flowing again.

There was a gentle glow flickering through the window as the shieldmaiden approached Joham’s house. Carefully she pushed open the wooden door with her left shoulder lessening the slight groan that normally announced someone’s entrance. Once inside the town baker, who was studiously writing by lantern light, looked up to see a damp mess of a woman.

“What, happened to you?”

“Nothing.” Rholarowyn answered slower than normal as she propped her sword in the nearby corner and then removed her outer tunic. Moving towards the small fire she asked. “Where is Nayaran?”

His eyes continued to examine the woman. “Nayaran is with his friend in the back house, I thought it better they sleep here tonight.”

“Good!” she replied and then took a deep breath.

The man persisted. “Are you going to tell me?”

“I took a walk down near the creek. I got cold that is all.” She answered looking down upon the print neatly written upon the cream colored parchment. Joham strategically shifted some empty papers to cover up the last page. The woman moved away as Joham continued, “Malmiuta had some of the tea she made sent over. I was told it will help you to sleep.”

The woman turned toward the open chair and wearily she plunked herself down onto its hard surface. Reaching out for a mug and the clay pot she filled her cup to the top and faded back into the chair, “I need this.”

“Is THAT blood!” Joham quickly rose up to his feet and reached for her left arm. There mingled with the black fabric of her long sleeve under tunic was the clotting texture of drying blood next to a neatly sliced tear. “Rholarowyn were you attacked?”

“No Joham, I wasn’t attacked!” she wearily shot back. “Well not officially.”

His concern grew as the man quickly rolled up her sleeve exposing a three inch slash on the top of her upper forearm.

“Not officially?” Joham slowed, he did not like the look in her eyes. “If not officially then what!” Rholarowyn lowered her eyes not wanting to endure yet another battle. “Wait here!” The man finally commanded.

With her left arm now propped up upon the rustic eating table, Rholarowyn drank. The tea was cooler now and the taste was more pleasant than some of the other herb mixtures the wise women had made in the past. She easily drained the first cup and poured herself another. Just as she downed the second his voice called out again.

“Go slow with the tea, I was also told the dosage has been doubled,” Joham’s voice caution from the other room. Just as the woman placed the empty cup upon the table the man reentered.

“How many was that?”

She held up two fingers.

“Wonderful, you will sleep through to midday tomorrow.” Joham stated sarcastically but accurately. “Leave your arm there.” Rholarowyn complied and as he diligently cleaned out the wound with warm water and herbs. The tension between the two only grew until Rholarowyn finally confessed.

“I challenged Lienoril to a duel.”

“What?” The man’s eyes shot up from her arm. “Why? Where!?!”

“By the north end of the barn.” She answered with a mater of fact reply.

“Did you leave him there? Was he standing?”

“Yes Joham, he was standing. I did not kill the man.”

He starred at the shieldmaiden suppressing his disapproval. “Rholarowyn is there any particular reason you decided to challenge the man charged to your protection?”

“Because my test wasn’t finished and because was there.” She answered bluntly.

“He was there…” The man repeated dumbfounded, “...and where exactly was there, by the barn?”

“No Joham “there” was in his bed.”

“YOU were in the man’s bed!?!”

"No..." her voice grew wearier as she spoke. "I snuck into his room, THEN went to his bed. I pressed the tip of my blade up to his neck, and demanded that he finish my test!”


The baker continued to stare. “Rholarowyn you can’t…you shouldn’t be…” then he stopped noting her exhaustion and looked down flabbergasted. “You are going to need stitches.” Shaking his head he rose again. “Press on it with this.” There was a long pause before she heard his voice from the other room.

“Woman WHAT were you thinking?”

“It wasn’t that bad.” She attempted to yell back. “He’s a clean fighter and he didn’t pierce me with his sword when he clearly could have….well not intentionally.” After a quick self-examination of the angry wound she pressed the sterile fabric upon her lower arm. Odd that she didn’t feel the pain of it. It was several minutes before Joham returned armed with new supplies. He was as diligent as master craftsman working the skin gently, closing the wound, all the while muttering under his breath.

Once the wound was tightly closed he carefully washed the rest of her arm, wiped it with a healing salve, and covered it with a protective wrap. “That is all I can do for you tonight.” He looked toward the woman and saw the tea was taking affect. “Rholarowyn, go to bed.” The shieldmaiden stood up and wobbled slightly. There was a slight sorrow in her voice, “Thank you Joham…for everything,”

Not dismissing his frustration he waived her off knowing she’d sleep well into the day. When she had left Joham regrouped. Tucking the letter away in a safe place, he picked up the lantern and quietly headed out in search of Lienoril AND Earendil.

.

[earendil81]

She had left the men at the door of their own inn, not so far from the place she was staying. She needed the time alone, the silence and the chance to accept all that was happening at once.

Mostly she gathered her things absent-minded, her thoughts wandering to what had been and no longer was, to the people of the past who were gone and those of the present who were expecting her.
It was not fair of the king to bring her in the midst of this. She had children, young still even though two of them were of an age she'd been when she first rode in Rhûdaur with the Rangers. But it had been another time, another life; they deserved the childhood she never had.

She had been sitting for some time, reading a book she'd brought along, stories of Rohan, which language she was still learning, when a knock came at the door. Only then did she realize that the sun was up; the night would have been short for the human.

Leaving the book on the small table by the chair, she went and opened the door. It was Joham and he looked concerned.
"What is it with all of you? Don't you sleep either? I thought it was the "privilege" of my race..."
He smiled wearily.
"I need to speak to you of Rholarowyn and other things."
"Like what? I don't think I can bear to hear any more news of undead or disappeared but found people."
"I am sorry. I know it was a lot for you too. But you seem to be taking it better than your friend."
"Don't be misled, I am not taking it well. I only hide it better, although not as well as I might have in the past."
"She won't be ready at midday."
She could feel the pang of anger and worry nag at her guts.
"Nothing to worry about, she needs it. It was a soothing tea and she drank more than she knew to."
"I guess there is not much I can do about this, is there." He was about to talk but she interrupted him. "What did you need me to know?"

[Rholarowyn]

“May I?” Joham asked motioning to the nearby overstuffed chair. “I will be brief.”

The woman nodded and they both sat down. The man looked at the bound item upon table and reached over. He quickly recognized the book and its writings. He held on to the hardback pages as he began.

“Earendil, as a servant of the King, and as a friend of Rholarowyn, I need your help. I fear we…no, reflecting back I know we should have handled the situation with Rholarowyn differently.” As he began his sincere dark eyes looked directly at the woman. “We should have included Bryttar, but more importantly, we should have included you the moment she appeared at the Mithril Knight Guild House in Mirkwood.” He then thumbed purposefully through the pages of the book before placing it down to rest upon the wooden table and took a deep breath.

“We needed time, her appearance with two Easterling children made no sense. We needed to understand who she was after 10 years and to whom her allegiances stood. There is still much we don’t know about what happened, but as you heard from the King’s letter, we have verified the important parts of her story. That much has been confirmed before she left Mirkwood and came here.”

Earendil listened intently so he continued.

“Rholarowyn needs help and this I ask of you. She has returned to our lands but they too have changed. I can think of no other, not even Bryttar who can help her reintegrate back into the lands of the West. You as a woman and one who has spent time in the East will better know what internal challenges she may be struggling with. Lieonoril and Ryomer will protect her and her son, along with you, but they don’t understand who Rholarowyn was and what motivated her before. Finally, you are a warrior and a mother, and so too is Rholarowyn, for these reasons and for the bond that you two once had, I ask for your help."

.

[earendil81]

She sighed... they did not understand. But how could she blame them?

"Joham, you do not have to ask for my help. I will be there for Rholarowyn no matter what." She looked away for a moment before locking her eyes with the man's. "I won't tell you you did wrong. To be entirely truthful, the knowledge that helping Rholarowyn might endanger the life of my family is unsettling. It is not something I would tell her though. Because I do not doubt her loyalty and allegiance and telling her that I fear to involve the ones I love would be the same as telling her I doubt her, which I don't."

It was hard to find the words. How could she explain to him what Rholarowyn would actually be up against. Not the suspicion, not the public accusation something else.
"I think you are wrong though. My time in the East will not help me understand the struggle within. I was not there long enough. But I do understand the struggle to fit in a place where people only look at you with distrust." She paused.

"You have the ear of the King don't you?" He nodded. "And he has yours; so he will have told you about me." Again the man nodded. "He may not have known though the feelings I went through when it was found I was a woman in Minas Tirith." Denethor sent her away then; she was exiled and not to come back unless she wished death.

"I came back despite the Stewart's forbidding it, and I kept my life only because his son spoke for me. Still none trusted me until I almost died from an orc blade that was meant for Boromir. Even after that it was not easy... when only four of us came back from Osgiliath swimming across the river some would whisper that I had fled the battle leaving some companions to die. They never said a word in front of our lord or his sons though, but the whispers hurt anyways. How do you fight when you are not sure someone will be there for you?"

She stood up and paced for a moment before stopping by the window. Outside, the sun was rising higher. Dawn was gone and people started to wander out, still dazed from the dance of the night before but going about their daily chores and duties.

"You have to understand Joham; the truth is that you, Ryomer even I will not be able to protect Rholarowyn from the whisperers. She needs to find in herself the strength and the belief that those who trust her are the ones who count in her life, whether they hold power in Gondor or not. That is all we can do; the rest will be up to her."

Rholarowyn's worst enemy would be her doubts; because they would cast a shadow about her that could create suspicion from others. She needed to find strength and faith in herself. An outburst like the one against Lienoril would only prove to help her detractors who would say "See how much she wants to prove herself. It must mean she's false."

[Rholarowyn]

Joham considered her words before speaking again. “I will not claim to understand the heart of a woman especially one who picks up the sword…you both chose the warrior’s path and now you both face new challenges. I cannot explain why she needed to confront Lienoril tonight except that maybe he represents something she believes she has lost, perhaps Gondor itself…”

He paused and looked down at the book of Rohan before he rose and turned back to the standing woman. “Rholarowyn has overcome the whispers before, where my concern is lies deeper. It is her unspoken words. It is the forces of evil I know exists in the East especially towards women. It is the things she has seen, the experiences she had."

He took two steps towards the woman at the window and looked sincerely into her blue eyes. Under other circumstances he would have placed a hand upon her shoulder, but this was not the time, nor the place as he did not know the warrior well enough; however, he did expose a more tender side as he continued,

“You may not have been in the East long, but I know you know of the darkness there. I know you know of the unspoken secrets that only the women there hold. Earendil, I know you must know of the silent crimes committed and I fear that even her skill with the blade did not help her…Surely you know something of what I speak?”

.

[earendil81]

“You may not have been in the East long, but I know you know of the darkness there. I know you know of the unspoken secrets that only the women there hold. Earendil, I know you must know of the silent crimes committed and I fear that even her skill with the blade did not help her…Surely you know something of what I speak?”

She looked into the man's eyes and then away. She brought her eyes back to him; how could she explain to him? Her voice caught in her throat as she started to speak.
"Joham, you have to understand. For me Nûrnen is a shadow. Whatever horror I saw before has been blurred by the Lake in a way. It has become a wall of sort. I don't remember the East beside what I said earlier. Maybe there is more to what I saw, what I experienced there but I don't know. And it scares me too. What will happen to me when I do remember? And who will be hurt by it?"

She paused breathing heavily.
"But I know of another woman who was hurt in the East and it was her world. She was to be brought a slave to a man of importance in Harad; she was the daughter to a tribe leader of Rhûn, a virgin and a child maybe fourteen years of age. Before she was in the slave caravan for three days they raped her many times in one night. And in order for her not to speak of their crime, they cut her tongue. They were found even though for another slave spoke in her name and so the culprits died at the hand of the slave master. But he had no use left for her; the girl was supposed to be unsoiled. He let her to find her way home or die. She never went home; she arrived in the West and gave birth to a child. She did not die; but I am not sure she ever was happy about this."

She had not followed Rhoe not only because of anger, but also because of fear and sorrow. She understood now.
"I don't know if I can help Rhoe with that. I can listen if she needs to speak of it; I can be the understanding ear. But I am afraid that until I remember I am as unable to grasp what she lived as you are." Her shoulders sagged her voice ringing with sadness. "Not the friend I should be right? Nor the one she deserves now."

[Rholarowyn]

Joham remained quiet as he reflected on her words. All warriors had their demons and they either learned to deal with them or found ways to avoid them, usually through drink. However, some he knew experienced such horror that they lost all memories of an event or of a series of events. He had seen it happen before and many times some unknown noise, smell, or even a passing look from another could trigger their return. Some were ready, others were not.

“Earendil,” he said quietly and this time he did reach out to gently comfort her sagging shoulders. “Perhaps it is not just Rholarowyn who needs your help; consider that you may need hers as well. You are a true friend and together I believe you will both find your way.”

The man removed his had from her shoulder and waited for any last words the woman may want to share.

.

[earendil81]

“Perhaps it is not just Rholarowyn who needs your help; consider that you may need hers as well. You are a true friend and together I believe you will both find your way.”

Of course he was right; she remembered speaking of the East after she came back. She had to give a report of what she had seen but it was all a blur. She seemed to recall she did not speak much. But she could not remember why. Nothing she saw in the East could be worse than Nûrnen so why had she erased it from her memory?

She had been able to do away with so many painful memories with Herger and the children. The two of them had defeated their demons together and she had no idea she had some left. And apparently pretty big ones she had buried so deep she had no reminiscence of them. What could be worse than letting the ones she loved die? And not once, twice.

"We will find a way. I guess. We have to. How long have you known I was to come here? I can't say I planned to stop here so what would you have done to make me come to this place? If you can tell..."