The Dwarves Guild

The varied peoples of Middle-earth at times found unity in their pursuits, and all too often experienced deep rifts. Engage in lively conversations as we banter about the differences between the Alliances, and recruit for our People as well. Remember, keep it friendly.

Postby Johnny_Flett » Sat Feb 21, 2004 2:12 pm

Aragorn! The enemies' bowels are moving!
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Postby lark » Sat Feb 21, 2004 2:27 pm

Ummmmm, yes dear.<BR><BR>**Pats JF on the head**<BR><BR>Why don't you have another ale? Maybe not.<BR><BR>OK Riot, I think I figured out where the gender confusion came from. you said:<BR><BR><i>And as for you, lark, an elvish wife you mean?</i><BR><BR>I thought you ment for yourself. I get it now! You were insinuating that JF is a girl!<BR><BR>**Looks down JF's shirt.**<BR><BR>NO, he is definitely a boy!<img src="http://www.tolkienonline.com/mb/i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif"border=0><BR><BR>Enough of that, now back to dwarf business...
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Postby Johnny_Flett » Sun Feb 22, 2004 1:19 pm

You are herewith forewarned:<BR><BR>A class action suit on behalf of the men of Dale, the men of Laketown and the elves of Mirkwood has been filed in Eregion Sixth District Court. It is seeking damages both property and punitive from the dwarves of the Lonely Mountain for the environmental damage caused by<BR>their return. More specifically, the sheer tonnage of metabolic waste that they annualy deposit into the River Running and the negative impact on the quality of the drinking water and the quality of life for those downstream from the mountain. The heavy consumption of alcoholic beverages and the lack of roughage in their diet has turned life on our lake and waterways from an idylllic, dream like existence into a living, breathing nightmare.<BR><BR>You and/or your representatives are summoned to appear on the first day of the last moon of winter at the Municipal Court House, 12 Bard Street, Laketown.<BR><BR>We knew that the the return of the King of the Mountain would cause our 'rivers to golden run', but perhaps we were not specific enough<BR>as to how he was to accomplish this without posing a serious risk to public health and safety.<BR><BR><BR><BR><BR>Heath Withering<BR>Attorney at Large<BR>Representative<BR>White Council Enterprises, Ltd.<BR>Laketown
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Postby GrandaughterofGaladreil » Sun Feb 22, 2004 7:39 pm

um, ok. I have been gone for a while, someone, in one brief paragragh, explain what happened. I do not have the time at present to read everything.<BR><BR>~GOG~
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Postby Johnny_Flett » Sun Feb 22, 2004 9:19 pm

Mae Govannen, young one...<BR><BR>Apparently our dwarves have fled the mountain! Fearing the impending litigation, they have fled to the south and are hiring themselves out as ammunition for the catapults of Sauron...<BR><BR>...perhaps Lark and I and yourself can fumigate the halls of the barnyard odor they left and begin a proper kingdom... <BR><BR>...how is your grandmother this age?
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Postby wind_walker » Sun Feb 22, 2004 9:51 pm

Valentines is a busy time and i've had much work since. Forgive my absence, but if you scan the Rings' Guild and the current Bards' Guild Festival, you will know of another project that has eatten my time...<BR>To the lawsuit, there are no cleaner metalsmiths in the land. If anything, it is the forge run by you downstream of the mountain that causes your issues for the water between us and them is clear. (they set up that forge so there would be a chance of such lawsuit and blame it on us.)<BR><BR>GOG, the usual: drinking, threats of fights, petty arguing, and a lawsuit.<BR><BR>-WW
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Postby lark » Sun Feb 22, 2004 10:23 pm

I'm so glad to see you back again WW. Someone needs to keep this group under control, and there's no one like a dwarf for that job!<BR><BR>I'm glad to see you again too, GOG. Where have you been? We thought you had gone to Valinor.
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Postby GrandaughterofGaladreil » Wed Feb 25, 2004 1:53 pm

Lark- Naw, I had not left for Valinor. I have just been away on a busy schdule. The norm for me anyway.<BR><BR>Flett- I have not seen my Grandmother lately. Too busy has my schedule been, as I have said. Now tell me, why are you accusing these poor Dwarven friends of mine of such things?<BR><BR>WW- I see. Let us hope that this can be settled nicely, and without a fight.<BR>
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Postby wind_walker » Wed Feb 25, 2004 6:23 pm

COUNTRER-SUIT!!!!!<BR><BR>(ps still working on details)<BR><BR>-WW
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Postby Johnny_Flett » Wed Feb 25, 2004 9:33 pm

White Council Enterprises Ltd. is proud to announce the addition of Lipscabb and Klot to it's legal team. The finest lawyers this side of the<BR>Gap of Rohan, this Uruk-Hai duo is known for it's resounding victories in the cases of 'Stuart Townsend vs. Viggo Mortensen', and 'Legolas Greenleaf vs. Bausch and Lomb'. Their ferocious crossbow examinations, brow beatings and occasional devouring of witnesses make them a welcome addition to our team. They are currently being kept on retainer (nothing but maggoty bread) pending trial against Lonely Mountain Inc.<BR><BR>Heath Withering<BR>WCE Ltd.
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Postby lark » Wed Feb 25, 2004 9:38 pm

Boys, boys. Must this all end in litigations? Won't somebody think about the children? Umm, urr, I mean hobbits?
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Postby GrandaughterofGaladreil » Thu Feb 26, 2004 2:04 pm

um, <img src="http://www.tolkienonline.com/mb/i/expressions/face-icon-small-confused.gif"border=0>, you guys confused me. Like, seriously confused me, that you did.<BR><BR>~GOG~
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Postby Lady_Galadriel786 » Sun Feb 29, 2004 11:58 am

<em>LadyG pokes her head in</em><BR><BR>What is going on, guys? *GASP* What have I missed?<BR><BR><BR>Sorry, I haven't posted much here... more of a lurker at the moment, thanks to RL butting in. I'm dying just to keep up with my 3 RP's, let alone the Guilds I belong to.<BR><BR><BR>But, I haven't disappeared, I promise.<BR><BR><BR><em>With that, she pours herself a drink, and goes off to a corner to relax...</em>
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Postby lark » Sun Feb 29, 2004 8:39 pm

Sorry about any confusion we may have caused. <BR><BR>You can try ignoring the Flettster if you like. It all makes more sense if you do. Good luck at it though. I've been trying to ignore him for years, but he seems to have a way of making his presence noticed.<img src="http://www.tolkienonline.com/mb/i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif"border=0>
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Postby GrandaughterofGaladreil » Mon Mar 01, 2004 2:08 pm

Alrighty then. I see. I still feel lost and confused.<BR><BR>*picks up another mug of ale, and begins to gulp it down in an almost unlady like manner*<BR><BR>
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Postby naryatheringoffire » Mon Mar 01, 2004 3:04 pm

So is anybody up for a bit of orc hunting, it is amazing whata bit of dwarvish ale can do to the senses<BR>
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Postby lark » Mon Mar 01, 2004 3:44 pm

GrandaughterofGaladriel, I think you may have found the best way to handle this thread.<img src="http://www.tolkienonline.com/mb/i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0> <BR><BR>Orc hunting? I'm game, if you don't mind a woman coming along.
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Postby wind_walker » Mon Mar 01, 2004 8:15 pm

The best woman can swing an axe with her man. Any woman capeable of slaying is welcome to hunt with me.<BR><BR>GOG, CHUG! CHUG! CHUG!!!<BR><BR>-WW
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Postby lark » Mon Mar 01, 2004 9:57 pm

I don't have an axe, but I do have this...<BR><BR>**pulls out a lovely, elvish made sword with horses on the hilt**<BR><BR>This is Nahar. It was a wedding gift from JF's mother. It's never been used. Well, at least not on anyone but JF and that was just the blunt side so it doesn't really count.<BR><BR>So where are these alleged orcs?
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Postby Johnny_Flett » Mon Mar 01, 2004 10:11 pm

***J_F staggers up to bar***<BR><BR>Let the Lord of the Matted Beard come forth! That abuse may be heaped upon him!<BR><BR><BR>***sees WW in corner and takes a giant gulp***<BR><BR>I can see in your beard the same foam that would take the heart of me...<BR>The day may come when the livers of men fail<BR>When we forget our wallets, and welsh on the next round...<BR>But it is not this day!<BR><BR>An unhappy hour of beer flies and empty mugs<BR>When our blood alcohol levels come crashing down<BR>But it is not this day!<BR>This day we Drink!<BR><BR>By all that you can hold in your huge bladders<BR>I bid you Binge!<BR>Dwarves of the Mountain!<BR><BR>***J_F takes another huge drink, trips over scabbard and falls head first into the fireplace. The beautiful Lark retrieves him and gently pats out the flames with a chair***
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Postby lark » Tue Mar 02, 2004 10:07 pm

For goodness sake, JF, sober up! We're talking about orc huntng.<BR><BR>**sigh**
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Postby Johnny_Flett » Thu Mar 04, 2004 11:25 pm

***J_F, whose head has been swathed in a hundred bandages, and now appears like a giant Q-tip, regains consciousness and speaks***<BR><BR>Two tipsy elves, the ravishing Lark, and an AWOL dwarf: a finer fighting force I have never seen. On the morrow, we ride for Mount Gundabad! What say you, WindBreaker?
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Postby GrandaughterofGaladreil » Fri Mar 05, 2004 2:00 pm

*looks at JF, and shakes her head. she then turns to WW* <BR><BR>I want to go orc hunting<BR><BR>*moves her ranger cloak aside some, flashing the hilt of her sword*<BR><BR>When are we going?
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Postby Johnny_Flett » Sat Mar 06, 2004 12:23 am

***J_F chokes on drink in mid-gulp, coughs and emits a cloud of ale and saliva which slowly descends upon party***<BR><BR>Whew, sorry gang. GOG, you really caught me off gaurd. The last time I flashed my hilt like that, Lark smashed me in the teeth.<BR><BR>I prefer destroying them above ground, instead of in their tunnels. It's too smelly.<BR>If you have a good horse, we can take them in three days from the Grey Mountains, four or five days if we follow the Forest River. We can stop at EK's Halls and get me some athelas... <img src="http://www.tolkienonline.com/mb/i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0>
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Postby lark » Sat Mar 06, 2004 11:31 pm

I don't remember smashing you in the teeth, JF, but with my <em>unpredictable temper</em> I guess it's posible.<img src="http://www.tolkienonline.com/mb/i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif"border=0><BR><BR>It's seems we are all up for orc hunting. Are you coming with us WW?
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Postby wind_walker » Sun Mar 07, 2004 3:19 pm

Wind Walker stepps over to a tall long closet looking door. Taking the handle he answers lark, "why not, tis a pleasure to swing a blade!" The drew the door open, a lonn set of shelves ran deep into a tunnel. The right started with axes: twin headed, single head, throwing and others less common. Further back there was a smaller, yet substancial selection of swords. The other side had shields, axe belts, , and a number of other bladeless tools and weapons.<BR><BR>J_F's draw dropped...he tried to recompose himself as the dwarf turned to see their reactions. "Anyone need a weapon?"<BR><BR>On a side note, the <a href='http://www.tolkienonline.com/thewhitecouncil/messageview.cfm?catid=37&threadid=70099' target=_blank>Rings Guild</a> is holding a nice little competition to get a new Master Ring Holder, well, I am in the running, but aside from the RP we have to do, each contestand needs to recruit a new member... Well, I was wondering, if any of you are loking for a good and powerful *eyes J_F* Ring, check it out, I'll be happy to answer any questions you want.<BR><BR>-WW
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Postby Alassemiire_Arineel » Sun Mar 07, 2004 4:24 pm

Dear Dwarves Guild,<BR>I am from the Mirkwood Elven Alliance, and I was wondering if you would like the idea of a little battle of wits between us two alliances/guilds? <img src="http://www.tolkienonline.com/mb/i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0> Are you up for it?<BR><BR>Namarie!<BR>~Alassemiire Arineel
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Postby wind_walker » Sun Mar 07, 2004 4:55 pm

i personally would be interrested in a match, but i cannot speak for all my companions, we ride for orc blood soon. perhaps if we share a match with you, you should share a hunt wiht us?<BR><BR>-WW
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Postby Johnny_Flett » Sun Mar 07, 2004 10:13 pm

Very impressive, WW...by the way, has anybody seen Arwen? I understand she has connections to a good Arrowsmith...<img src="http://www.tolkienonline.com/mb/i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif"border=0><BR><BR>Bring on the Mirkwood elves! You will see why I left...<BR><BR>I shall approach the Ring Guild tomorrow, providing no more geese fly into my face. It seems dangerous to me: the great power of the rings is only half-understood. The high explosives of the Rings are being worked into firecrackers for the simple to burn their fingers on. They are making a noise and leaving a bad smell without understanding the power they wield...<BR>
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Postby lark » Sun Mar 07, 2004 10:28 pm

I can't belive you used one of our wedding photos for your sig pic, J_F. How Sweet!!<img src="http://www.tolkienonline.com/mb/i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif"border=0> Thats us leaving for our honeymoon.<img src="http://www.tolkienonline.com/mb/i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif"border=0><BR><BR>That's a very impressive weapon cache, WW. You're not overcompensating for anything are you?<img src="http://www.tolkienonline.com/mb/i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0> Just kidding!<BR><BR>Actually, I could use something small, like a dagger, to keep close to me. I have a nice sword, as I mentioned before, but a backup might be a good idea.<BR><BR>I think I would enjoy a battle of wits, but J_F said I may not be properly armed.<img src="http://www.tolkienonline.com/mb/i/expressions/face-icon-small-confused.gif"border=0>
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