Ridikerous Role Play!

Come on over to Tom's House for the lighter side of Tolkien Fandom. Remember Tom's House is both powerful and innocent, so keep it clean and nice.

Postby SuzeQ » Sat Aug 04, 2001 6:28 pm

SUZEQ: Runs to find a fire extinguisher....it is uncertain if she'll ever find one.<BR><BR>She does however find an abandoned pair of pants. She gives those to crispy to replace the burning ones...but the new ones are...well...really really really...uh...small.<BR><BR><BR>Poor Crispy!
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Postby crispycreme » Sat Aug 04, 2001 8:34 pm

CRISPY wearing his new TINY AND TIGHT pants, squeaks in a falsetto voice<BR>Gee, thanks, Suze!<BR><BR><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0>
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Postby goatboy » Mon Aug 06, 2001 9:17 am

"We have to get in there and get the black crayon of doom!!" 'thenie pleaded.<BR><BR>Crispy and Goatboy stared at her as if she spoke a language foreign to them. Scatha picked up Crispy's discarded fire extinguisher and while performing an inspection of the firing mechanism, he accidentally discharged it in his face. Xatia's face was furrowed in concentration as she stared at the castle and wondered if she truly lefteth the iron pluggethed in. SuzyQ was distracted by the fact that Goatboy chose a narrative prose for posting in Ridikerous, while adopting the less descriptive but more chronologically friendly movie-script style for his W.I.N.K.L.E Jr. updates. The Narrator was busy polishing his brass, not expecting the party to actually make any progress for at least the next 5 posts.<BR><BR>Innocent Evil had taken the GTO down to Dol Amroth for an oil change and a car wash. There were rumors of a new type of pastry store opening, where the pastries actually had a hole in the middle, and were covered in a sugary glaze.<BR><BR>Inside the castle, The Lord of Lawyers sat in his chambers and comtemplated his evening. With Nazgul Lord out on a date, TLOL had no one to have an intelligent conversation with, so he was tempted to flip to the advertisements in the back of an adult magazine he'd purchased through a proxy from a local convenience store and calling some of the 900 numbers on Fladnag's credit cards. Mike the Dog had just gotten back from the groomers, and was content to stay beside the fireplace. Bob was on duty in the north tower, and wanted to try out the new-fangled computer contraption that had been installed. Imagine, getting to play solitaire without cards! Fladnag sat on his skull throne, and contemplated issues heavy on his mind.<BR><BR>"Do I stick with the black on black, or would a maroon border be more appropriate for the bathroom?" he queried of his interior decorator. "I like the gold fixtures and all, but the black is just too depressing! I want my bathroom to say 'evil but interesting.'"<BR><BR>"It all depends on who you want in your bathroom." his decorator coyly prodded. Lola LaFrond wasn't like any woman Fladnag had ever met. She was all delicate and smelled good, just like a woman should, and he felt all excited in her presence. He was just a little confused about her pronounced adam's apple and extremely strong handshake.<BR><BR>Fladnag rose from his throne and was "putting the moves" onto Lola when Nazgul Lord returned from his date. He stormed into the throne room in a huff, very visibly upset. He removed his steel crown and tossed it in the wastebasket, tossed his cloak in the hallway, drew his sword, and attacked Fladnag's Barcalounger with ferocity.<BR><BR>"Not go well, Leon?" asked Fladnag to Nazgul Lord, somewhat annoyed that NL was now crimping his style.<BR><BR>Nazgul Lord's eyes burned brightly as he turned to Fladnag. "She likes me like a brother. That damned 'Mouth-of-Sauron' bundle took her to a bed-and-breakfast two weeks ago, and they've been an item ever since! She was just too afraid to call this date off since, she claims, I 'made such a big production' about it's scheduling!"<BR><BR>"Well," said Fladnag, "You did slay the other three guys she was seeing at the time, and demand blood if she couldn't make it."<BR><BR>"So??? What's the harm in that? I AM the Witch-King of bloody Angmar after all!!" He strode over to the couch and fell into it. "And to think that I sat through 'America's Sweethearts!'"<BR><BR>"Ooohh, I just looooooove John Cusack!" offered Lola. "But what's up with that Catherine Zeta-Jones woman? I mean, Michael Douglas is sooooo 80's!" <BR><BR>Nazgul Lord scowled even more. "The best part was when it looked like someone was going to die. Other than that, the vicious dog, and impaling genitalia with a cactus, the movie was a total waste."<BR><BR>Fladnag looked at Lola amd smiled. He turned back to NL. "You thought 'Schindler's List' was a comedy. Don't you think your tastes are too dissimilar?"<BR><BR>"I am the Witch King of Angmar." Nazgul Lord declared. "She will change her tastes to suit me." He sighed. "Now that the Paths of the Dead are empty, my options are seriously limited. Maybe we can hunt down a female elf and have a nice evil torture session..." his voice trailed off as he ran the possibilities through his mind. "Oh Flad, by the way, who's the TV?"<BR><BR>Lola blushed, and Fladnag stood confused. Then the horror of realization gripped his face when he realized what a TV really was. He screamed.<BR><BR>------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------<BR><BR>There was a loud and piercing wail. "You hear something?" asked Crispy, right before Lola's body make a 12' deep hole.<BR><BR>"Rmmmrflplph!" Scatha replied, trying to get all of the suppressant out of his face.
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Postby crispycreme » Mon Aug 06, 2001 10:57 am

LOL Goat! I was wondering when La-la-la-la-Lola would get introduced in here!<BR><BR>-------<BR>GOATBOY<BR>Well? Are we ready?<BR><BR>SCATHA<BR>Ready for what?<BR><BR>GOATBOY<BR>To storm the gates and retrieve the Black Crayon!<BR><BR>XATIA<BR>The gates thou refereth to are 20 cubits high, and 2 cubits thick!<BR><BR>B_ATHENA<BR>We can try knocking.<BR><BR>CRISPY pulling something out of his hair<BR>You can try this hairpin.<BR><BR>SUZEQ<BR>What's a cubit?<BR><BR>GOATBOY<BR>We must not delay any further. The fate of the world hangs in the balance!<BR><BR>FATE OF THE WORLD<BR>I have a fear of heights!<BR><BR>SCATHA<BR>Goat, I realize that urgency is needed, but we need a way to get in there!<BR><BR>GOATBOY<BR>CHARGE!<BR><BR>Goatboy sprinted to the gates. The rest of our heroes stood there and shook their heads.<BR><BR>But at that moment, just before the (what would have certainly been fatal) impact of Goatboy's noggin and the impenetrable gates of the fortress....<BR><BR>THE AUDIENCE<BR>What? What happens?<BR><BR>...The Lord of Lawyers walked out of the now open gates, briefcase in hand, as he was heading out to defend yet another ax murderer. <BR><BR>THE AUDIENCE groans<BR><BR>Goatboy slams into the LOL, sending the briefcase sprawling across the ground, which ends up at SuzeQ's feet. Goatboy's clothes go scattering (aka Charlie Brown) as he ends up on top of the sprawled Evil Lawyer.<BR><BR>GOATBOY lying there in his Pokemon briefs<BR>Ow...<BR><BR>LORD OF LAWYERS<BR>Get off of me, you dolt!<BR><BR>SUZEQ opening the briefcase<BR>Videos? Interesting. What's this one? 'Lobelia's Libido' eh?<BR><BR>LORD OF LAWYERS poking his head up from the pile<BR>Hey! Stop going through my briefcase!<BR><BR>SCATHA gathering his wits<BR>Let's go folks! Here's our chance!<BR><BR>CRISPY gathering his wit<BR>I didn't know I had one of these!<BR><BR>XATIA<BR>Verily indeed. Let us commenceth. To the Crayon of Ebon!<BR><BR>OUR HEROES rush through the gate! Scatha grabbed Goatboy by the ankle as they charged passed.<BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR>
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Postby goatboy » Mon Aug 06, 2001 12:08 pm

Now I have Linus' Theme running through my head!<BR><BR>Do do doo, do do doo, doo doo, do doo doot doo!
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Postby B_Athena » Mon Aug 06, 2001 12:23 pm

you guys are funny <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR>funny looking! D'oh!
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Postby InnocentEvil » Wed Aug 08, 2001 4:35 am

Goat! That was our drum solo jr year of high school for state marching band competition! I still play it on the piano all the time. Lovin' it!<BR><BR><BR>BTW, they do better oil changes in Gondor, but the best wax job around is definetely the one at the Mordor Scrub N' Wax <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-devil.gif"border=0>
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Postby goatboy » Wed Aug 08, 2001 2:21 pm

<i>The Lord of Lawyers has been attacked by our heroes...</i><BR><BR>"Getteth his briefs!" called Xatia.<BR><BR>'thenie dive tackled TLOL and wrestled around the ground with him. She soon came up waving a colored cloth. "He's wearing Frodo boxers!" she cried aloud, laughing.<BR><BR>Xatia rolled her eyes. "Nay, thy simpleton, his legal briefs!!"<BR><BR>All eyes turned to Bill the Pony as he was finishing off the rest of the stack of long yellow papers. He chewed contentedly on a notepad, and all they could see was "How OJ got away with mur..."<BR><BR>Crispy and Scatha had not been idle. Using Goatboy as a wedge, they managed to keep the gate open. SuzyQ ran into the keep and flashed her halter top to the easily distracted guards, and Scatha pummeled them unconscious with the (now empty) fire extinguisher. Crispy then grabbed hold of a rope that led to a balcony that housed the controls for the gate, and raised it back up again. Goatboy fell out of the guide, dead.<BR><BR>"Ohmigosh!" cried 'thenie. "Goatboy's croaked!"<BR><BR>"Woe! Whatteth shall we do without thine aid?"<BR><BR>"He's okay." stated Crispy. "I stole his character sheet from the dungeon master when he answered the door for pizza. I changed his hit points to 2000 and his constitution to 1789."<BR><BR>Goatboy groaned and rolled over. "What happened?" he croaked.<BR><BR>"
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Postby goatboy » Wed Aug 08, 2001 2:29 pm

<i>The Lord of Lawyers has been attacked by our heroes...</i><BR><BR>"Getteth his briefs!" called Xatia.<BR><BR>'thenie dive tackled TLOL and wrestled around the ground with him. She soon came up waving a colored cloth. "He's wearing Frodo boxers!" she cried aloud, laughing.<BR><BR>Xatia rolled her eyes. "Nay, thy simpleton, his legal briefs!!"<BR><BR>All eyes turned to Bill the Pony as he was finishing off the rest of the stack of long yellow papers. He chewed contentedly on a notepad, and all they could see was "How OJ got away with mur..."<BR><BR>Crispy and Scatha had not been idle. Using Goatboy as a wedge, they managed to keep the gate open. SuzyQ ran into the keep and flashed her halter top to the easily distracted guards, and Scatha pummeled them unconscious with the (now empty) fire extinguisher. Crispy then grabbed hold of a rope that led to a balcony that housed the controls for the gate, and raised it back up again. Goatboy fell out of the guide, dead.<BR><BR>"Ohmigosh!" cried 'thenie. "Goatboy's croaked!"<BR><BR>"Woe! Whatteth shall we do without thine aid?"<BR><BR>"He's okay." stated Crispy. "I stole his character sheet from the dungeon master when he answered the door for pizza. I changed his hit points to 2000 and his constitution to 1789."<BR><BR>Goatboy groaned and rolled over. "What happened?" he croaked.<BR><BR>"You died." explained Scatha. "Get over it and come give us a hand with this gate."<BR><BR>'thenie and Xatia were hog-tying TLOL with his boxers and some of the videotape pulled from the briefcase. Suzy had come back out and was rummaging through the briefcase. "Hey, lookee what I found!" she called out, holding up a coloring book.<BR><BR>It was an ancient coloring book, and it was bound in plastic. Xatia took it up and held it close. "Gasp!" she gasped gaspingly. "Thine hath located the evil coloring book of Melkor! Do you know what this means?"<BR><BR>All heads shook, while The Lord Of Lawyers shot daggers with his eyes.<BR><BR>"We can use its evil powers to counteract Fladnag!" <BR><BR>"How?" they all asked.<BR><BR>Xatia smiled. "The Crayola of Ebon musteth have been created for some fell purpose." she explained. "Nay, what good ist a crayon without the book suited for its purpose?"<BR><BR>The all smiled. Crispy called out "Hey! I have a pair of boxers just like that!"<BR><BR>
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Postby Ar-Alexandros » Fri Aug 10, 2001 2:24 am

THE SCENE: The LOTL is down and our heroes have just gotten inside the Tower.<BR><BR><i> But suddenly, amidst gasps of the audience, the Lord of the Lawyers regains consciousness and glimpses our heroes that are near the Gate. He stands up, and laughs evily!<BR><BR> LOTL LAUGHING EVILY: MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA! You fools! You know I cannot be defeated by such trivial means! It requires a truly Ridikerous Death-Blow to banish me from this tale!! But that will never happen of course! And I've just had about enough of you all. It's time you meet your Creator!<BR><BR> The Lord of the Lawyers reached inside his Armani suit and pulled out a fine piece of paper. He showed it to our heroes. They groaned. On top of the paper, large black words read: "</b>CAPITAL PUNISHMENT</b>".<BR><BR> XATIA: Verily, not even Goatboy's augmented Character Abilities haveth the power to geteth us out of this messeth!<BR> <BR> The LOTL broke into an insane fit of laughter as he sadistically lowered his pen in order to sign the Capital Punishment form while our Heroes awaited for their doom to come, when....<BR><BR> VOICE FROM ABOVE: MIND YOUR HEEEEADS!!!<BR><BR> The LOTL looked up and became pale. Our heroes looked up and were uncertain as what to do.<BR> <BR> A large Viking longboat landed on top of the Lord of the Lawyers with a deafening crash. When the dust settled, a head poked from inside the boat. It was an old man. He looked at the Heroes.<BR><BR> SAVIOR OF THE DAY: Am I home yet?<BR><BR> GOATBOY: Uhhhh....<BR><BR> SOTD: Never mind, I'll find my own way. Anyone interested in converting?<BR> <BR> SCATHA: Ummmm....<BR><BR> SOTD: Didn't think anyone would. Well, got to go now...<BR><BR> The old man blew into a ridiculously large horn that was inside the longboat and the boat flew off into the air. Up, up and away, away to mysterious lands and untold adventures.<BR><BR> XATIA: I daresay, whateth else shall the Writers willt cometh up with?<BR> <BR> THENIE: Indeed.<BR><BR> XATIA: Verily.<BR><BR> CRISPY: I'm hungry! Anyone has a ridiculously long sandwich to spare?</i>
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Postby Radagast » Fri Aug 10, 2001 5:43 pm

And indeed, the Lord of the Lawyers was most Finishedith!<BR><BR>Goatboy looked at where the longboat had landed and saw that the Lord of the Lawyers was gone! In his place lay a ebony briefcase carved of the night itself. Stars floated by on its surface, and it was sealed shut with a gold glasp - and it bore the mark of Melkor!<BR><BR>Crispy said, "Hey, maybe we should open it!"<BR><BR>Xatia smacked him and stated, "What are you, some kind of moron?"<BR><BR>Crispy smiled and replied, "Yup!"<BR><BR>Scatha muttered, "We'd better figure out what happened here quick - I think the Ninja Lawyers are coming!"<BR><BR>Xatia said, "Isn't it obvious! The Lord of the Lawyers' mortal form was destroyed, and thus he was banished to this briefcase for all eternity - or until one of enough power can unlock the briefcase and release him once more!"<BR><BR>Goatboy asked, "Yeah, but we still have his briefs? Are they also eternal?"<BR><BR>Crispy found a large donut in the hands of one of the stunned guards and asked, "Can we open the briefcase?"<BR><BR>Suzy Q groaned in disgust and said, "Fine - we'll do that later! Right now, we have Ninja Lawyers to worry about!"<BR><BR>And indeed, they did.<BR><BR>Ninja Lawyers came leaping out of the open castle gates, each wielding a deadly weapon and a briefcase. They moved with unnatural grace in their black suits, each with slicked-back hair, dark sunglasses, and an evil grin. Oddly, they also all looked alike and reeked of EVILNESS!!!<BR><BR>Suzy Q flashed her halter top once more, but a Ninja Lawyer cried out, "Indecent Exposure!" and started backflipping towards her!<BR><BR>-----------------------------------------------------<BR><BR>Meanwhile, in the Dark Tower of Untimely Doom and Lots of Bad Stuff - the one the heroes are invading, I think, Fladnag was busy at work. He had decided to begin work on a HUGE Black Crayon - one with enough range to cover all the world in evil scribbles!<BR><BR>HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!<BR><BR>But Nazgul Lord was rather distraught over losing Adunaphel to The Mouth of Sauron. He'd considered all the usual bad-guy solutions to a relationship problem, such as killing the Mouth, torturing both the Mouth and Adunaphel, or conquering Middle Earth, but he doubted any such deed would impress the lady Ringwraith.<BR><BR>Sadly, he mused, "I wonder if Her Serenity is available tonight?"<BR><BR>Fladnag nearly choked when he heard this as he worked on his giant Black Crayon. The crazy mage said, "What is it with you and Pain, anyway? Yeesh! Go get yourself a nice ghost chick or something - I have work to do!"<BR><BR>And the Nazgul Lord left gloomily...<BR><BR>
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Postby Haefalas » Sun Aug 12, 2001 7:39 am

<i>Haefalas wonders back from spain with a pair of sunglasses on his forehaed grinning and wondering what has happened.[i/]<BR><BR><i>Haefalas looks around and is once again faced with the lord of lawyers looming above[i/]<BR><BR>"hi peeps"<BR><BR>"yes welcome back but not now"<BR><BR>"ok... so we are gonna slay the lawyers, chase the black crayon rescuse everyone saving Ridikerous in it"<BR><BR>"yup"<BR><BR>"right ok i understand"
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Postby Ar-Alexandros » Sun Aug 12, 2001 9:07 am

Hope you feasted your eyes on Spanish women, Haefalas! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0><BR> I was right next door, in Portugal.<BR> <BR><i> J.R.R. Tolkien looks down on Ridikerous from his chateu up in the heavens and shakes his head in desperation.<BR><BR> "Dear, oh dear...those blasted Writers have stripped my works of their dignity. Yea, verily, thrice counfound them!"</i>
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Postby Haefalas » Sun Aug 12, 2001 11:59 am

rotfl but unfortunately i dont speak i word of spanish so i was not understood at all. <BR>"you look beautiful"<BR>"si? <i>insert other spanish words which i dont know[i/]"<BR>etc... <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-tongue.gif"border=0>
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Postby Ar-Alexandros » Wed Aug 15, 2001 1:38 pm

HEY PEOPLE!!<i> We've already been</i> to the dreaded Land of No Inspiration, no need to go there again! Come on, speak up! And, DON'T THINK! I once did that and was disappointed at the results!
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Postby SuzeQ » Wed Aug 15, 2001 1:55 pm

Man, I'm no good at this
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Postby Haefalas » Wed Aug 15, 2001 7:25 pm

CRISPY!!! <BR><BR><BR>where are you our dear inspiration <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0><BR>(if i post here in character now something will go wrong so im not going to just quite yet)
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Postby B_Athena » Fri Aug 17, 2001 8:27 am

Nija Laywers!! <i> Scatha Exclaimed! </i><BR><BR>Bloody Hell!! - i mean Bloodeth He - oh, whatever <i> Xatia cried.<BR><BR><BR>Suyze jumped up and down and leaped onto Crispy's back screaming </i> RIDE DONKEY!!! RIDE!! ON BARREL-RIDERS!!!<BR><BR><BR><i>And so Crispy pretended he was barrel. or a donkey. perhaps a Donkey/Barrel. <BR><BR><BR><BR>But Goatboy, mighty Goatboy, did not exclaim or weep. He smiled. For Goatboy had a Purpose. Though he knew it not. And the sight of Ninja's made him feel as if he perhaps had a purpose, at one time. Probably not now. But he did. At least he thought he did. He flet like there was a SOMETHING anyway. Maybe he was hungry.<BR><BR><BR>And thenie watched him smile. This wasnt right. He doesnt smile like That. What was going on here.<BR></i> Hold the phone <i> she declared. Scatha graciously took it from her.<BR><BR><BR></i>PAUSE!<i> She yelled forthrightly. All Froze. Xatia was weeping, as happens when suffering from InternetWithdrawalDisorder. Scatha held the phone up triumphantly, while Mike the Dog peed on his leg. Suze was stuck riding on Crispy, who apparently enjoyed being a barrel/donkey.<BR><BR><BR>And Goatboy was still smiling.<BR><BR><BR>Thenie rushed off stage and over to Son Of W.I.N.K.L.E where she grabbed the Black Purist Riders for a conference. They were gracious enough to tell her that they had no idea what the hell she was talking about. damn. she looked at PJ, who began to say something, but Thenie knew better than to mess with that and ran screaming away from him. Sam wept, and Arwen complimented her on the leather outfit. Aha! Finally: The Burnt Ranger.<BR><BR>He handed her THE SCROLL OF RIDIKEROUS.<BR><BR>She didnt read it. She just skimmed Goatboy's character quickly. She threw it back at him and quickly exited the set. She could tell they had their own problems to deal with.<BR><BR><BR>Back in RidiKerous, she marched over to Goatboy and pulled off his shirt. Thousands of girls fainted. She stared intently at his back, and quickly found the button. She pushed it. His back opened. Thousands of Men fainted. She glaced over the machinery until she found the lever labelled: FOR NINJA WARRIORS BUTT TO KICK. Aha! She cranked the lever, shut the back and replaced the shirt.<BR><BR><BR><BR></i>TIME IN!!!!!<i><BR><BR>But as everyone jumped into motion, Goatboy out-Motioned them all!! Arms, Legs, Horns, Kicks, Punches, Leaps, Stars, Moons, Swords, Knifes, Wit, Elbows, Feet, Noses, Knees, Butts - its more than one Narrator can possibly describe.<BR><BR><BR><BR>But when the Dust Cleared, the Heros were standing all alone. Well, Suze was on Crispy's back. And Scatha had climbed a telephone pole. And Xatia was more lying, than standing, but basically, you know, the Heroes were standing. The Ninja Warriors were gone. <BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR><BR>but where were they? </i>
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Postby Haefalas » Fri Aug 17, 2001 8:52 am

ROTFL!!!!<BR><BR>thenie does he have a do not push button like all evil masterminds put in their control room.
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Postby Xatia » Fri Aug 17, 2001 9:23 am

Xatia climbed to her feet, possessed once more for a short while of a computer she was tear-stained but resolute. Goatboy was standing in the doorway of the castle, swaying gently as Thenie switched him back to normal and closed his back up again. Crispy staggered towards the castle and fell over the threshold, taking SuzeQ with him. Scatha came slowly down his telephone pole.<BR><BR>"Wherefore ist that remains of the LOTL?" asked Xatia<BR><BR>Scatha moaned "The ninth Ninja must have escaped with it!"<BR><BR>Goatboy swayed a little more<BR><BR>"But that's terrible!" cried Thenie "I saw the ninth Ninja kicked into the distance as he rebounded of your telephone pole. Do you mean to say you let him get away with it?"<BR><BR>Scatha nodded sheepishly. The extra currents in the air this produced swirled across to Goatboy, who toppled gently over on top of Crispy.<BR>SuzeQ got to her feet "Who let who get away with what?"<BR><BR>Crispy's still position and general barrel impression disappeared in the blink of an eye. A bloodshot eye, in fact. Which, incidentally, is what his were. A low rumble, akin to the prelude of thunder that first taints a sunny sky, escaped from his throat.<BR><BR>With the unerring instinct which has, more or less, caused the continuation of the life of all the Heroes up until this point, the heads of those still conscious turned with one accord to look at this maniacal figure. Never had the innocent Crispy appeared so threatening.<BR><BR>"I HAD A DOUGHNUT" bellowed as a solid wall of twisting anguish from the Tower door. Fladnag started and the NL shook at this unexpected roar. The Tower of Untimely Doom shuddered from it's very foundations upwards.<BR><BR>"I HAD A DOUGHNUT" came again. No-one was left standing within half a mile of the source of this torturous wail that echoed across the forbidding landscape. Goatboy was already mercifully unconscious, the other heroes cowed beneath the waves of sheer sound.<BR><BR>"IT'S GONE! THEY TOOK MY DOUGHNUT! I HAD A DOUGHNUT AND SOMEONE TOOK IT" came in quick jabs of the impossible and faded into unbearable emptiness. Crispy's skin paled and he flopped down as a sudden relaxation of tension loosed his quivering muscles. His waxen pallor was almost deathly, but the maddened glint of his eyes was unquenched and unsullied by any earthly tint. The longing for doughnuts had purified and distilled what there was of his mind until now a single thought remained.<BR><BR>Xatia rose, shakily, and helped Thenie up. Thenie looked at the telephone pole and quickly marched across, removed the doughnut from where it had been stuck by a flailing Goatboy fist and pressed it into Crispy's clenched hand. Crispy's eyes closed even as he choked on an over-enthusiastic first mouthful. He slipped swiftly into blissful doughnut dreams.<BR><BR>"Well, so much for sneaking in quietly" muttered SuzeQ<BR><BR>"Yea verily" agreed Xatia.
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Postby B_Athena » Fri Aug 17, 2001 12:05 pm

LOL, Xatia!!!<BR><BR><BR>I just bet he does hae! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0>
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Postby B_Athena » Fri Aug 17, 2001 12:07 pm

RidiKerous...
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Postby B_Athena » Fri Aug 17, 2001 12:08 pm

... Triple Post!!<BR><BR><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0>
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Postby crispycreme » Fri Aug 17, 2001 2:31 pm

THE SCENE<BR><BR>God and Satan are in the middle of a long distance phone call.<BR><BR>GOD<BR>Your incompetent minion, Fladnag, doesn't stand a chance against my adept Group of Heroes. So how's things down there in Hell? Still hot?<BR><BR>SATAN<BR>HA! Your so called 'Group of Heroes' couldn't figure out how to scratch their butts, much less defeat my prodigy! Yeah, and we're a bit overcrowded at the moment as well. I need to send some lost souls over to the mines to start digging out some new living space.<BR><BR>GOD<BR>A 'prodigy'? Oh please! Why you chose such a bumbling fool for your pathetic attempt to conquer the earth never ceases to amaze me! Strange, we seem to have lots of available room up here in Heaven.<BR><BR>SATAN<BR>At least he has a powerful talisman! What do you guys have? An idiotic donut muncher! Hey! Did you see the Demons/Angels game on Spirit World Network last night? We kicked your ARSE! You owe me a human soul!<BR><BR>GOD<BR>But that ridiculous attempt to use LAWYERS! I mean, come on, any old Evil Lord could have come up with that one. How trite and ordinary! Yeah yeah, I'll find some pure sinless virgin and send her your way. But it's double or nothing for next weeks game!<BR><BR>SATAN<BR>Trite and ordinary? At least my minions are sticking to the laws of physics! What was with that anachronistic airplane stunt way back on page 4? Being pulled by a pony? That's so utterly CONTRIVED it makes me ill! Two humans souls, eh? Ok, it's a bet. I'll just drive my slaves a bit harder to get that space opened up. <BR><BR>GOD<BR>Welp, I gotta go. St. Peter is up in arms again. He wants yet ANOTHER vacation. Can you believe the nerve? Talk to ya later. Get thee gone, Satan.<BR><BR>SATAN<BR>Hasta man. This is me fleeing in terror. TTFN!<BR><BR>
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Postby B_Athena » Mon Aug 20, 2001 9:20 am

ROTFL <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0>!! Good one, Crispyness - i wondered when God and Satan were going to jump on in!! "Get thee gone Satan" LOL <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0><BR><BR><BR><BR>-------<BR><BR><i><BR><BR>The Scene: Illuvatir's Pad.<BR><BR>Illuvatir: Who in the name of Heaven and Hell were those dudes? Dammit! Melkor's little brother Crispy must be making up new songs again. When I find that littleBastard, why i'm gonna-!!!<BR><BR></i>
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Postby goatboy » Mon Aug 20, 2001 10:48 am

<i>A figure is seen at a desk...</i><BR><BR>Manwe stared intensely at the books open in front of him. Pages upon pages of musical notes stared back at him. His eraser was already worn down to a nubbin, and he didn't think the few pencil toppers he head left would be up to the task. He'd again have to ask Lorien to sing up some office supplies.<BR><BR>The musical notes made no sense as he read the score. "Ridikerous" was the title of the piece, yet as he stared at the page he could make out no song. There were some poetic turns here, and a flair there, and a few grand creshendoes, but this did not appear to be music in any direction he looked at it. He had tried and discarded almost every instrument in his repertoie with no luck, and his frustration level was reaching its highest since Feanor got to running off at the mouth.<BR><BR>"Are you sure this song works?" he asked a figure entering the room. The figure was in a mortal form, sporting long brown hair and beard, a bright blue coat and yellow hat.<BR><BR>"Hey now, hoy now, derry down dillo!" replied the newcomer.<BR><BR>"You're not down THERE right now Eru." he was becoming more annoyed. "Help me out with this!"<BR><BR>Illuvitar changed shape again and sat down at the other side of the desk. "Okay, I'm sorry child. Whazzup???"<BR><BR>Manwe rolled his eyes. "It's this theme! I can't make heads or tails of it! This passage here especially-"<BR><BR>"That's the GTO." Illuvitar offered.<BR><BR>"It makes no bloody sense! What is a GTO, what it is doing in Ea, and why would it just pop in and out of the song?" his voice started rising higher and higher. "And this talking pony! It seems to be the most rational theme in this tune, and IT is too erratic for me to follow!"<BR><BR>Illuvitar smiled at Manwe. "You need to get out more."<BR><BR>"THIS NEVER HAPPENED WHEN THE NOLDOR WERE RUNNING AROUND!"<BR><BR>"Relax." Illuvitar ordered. "Your problem is that you have no sense of humor."
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Postby B_Athena » Mon Aug 20, 2001 12:44 pm

LOL GOAT!!<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif"border=0><BR><BR><BR>--------------------------<BR>God walks into the room, survey's the scene and remarks:<BR><i>What are YOU doing?</i><BR>--------------------------<BR><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0>
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Postby B_Athena » Wed Aug 29, 2001 6:42 am

And so the Heros wake up from the nap of non-spriation to find themselves in the threshold of the Evil Castle.<BR><BR>Preparing themselves against evils of unspeakable terror, they slowly begin to look around.<BR><BR>Crispy was drawn to the concession stand, and but only saw BAGELS!<BR><BR>Goatboy looked out the window only to find ANOTHER in his GTO!!!<BR><BR>Xatia found a room filled with TORC hook-ups, but the door was LOCKED!!<BR><BR>Scatha ran to a mirror and waved at the handsome creature insid, but it wasn't HIS reflection.<BR><BR>Thenie ran in terror from a Box labeled: Thenie's Sanity.<BR><BR><BR>But as they drew together having encountered their own private Hells, they stoped in shock and stared at the small beings to their left, dancing upon a stange. Very small beings. With orange faces, and green hair. To their growing horror, they began to sing...<BR><BR><BR><i><BR><BR>Ooompa, Loompa, Doopity, Do,<BR>I've got another puzzle for you.<BR>Ooompa, Loompa, Doopity, De,<BR>If you were wise you'd listen to me.<BR><BR>What do you get when your leader's a JOKE?<BR>Can't get the Good Guys or even a SMOKE.<BR>Does not know how to-o give you a POKE.<BR><BR>You can't deal with lords like that....<BR><BR>da da da da da da da da.<BR><BR><BR><BR>Ooompa, Loompa, Doopity, Do.<BR>We are the midgets singing to you.<BR>Ooompa, Loompa, Doopity, De.<BR>You are the Good Guys? Eru help me.<BR><BR><BR>What do you get when the Good Guys are TWITS?<BR>Can't make a plot if life depended on IT.<BR>Will they get the Crayon o-or just QUIT.<BR><BR>You can't deal with Guys like that.<BR><BR>da da da da da da da da.<BR><BR><BR><BR><BR>Ooompa, Loompa, Doopity, Do.<BR>I've got some ad-vice fooor you.<BR>Ooompa, Loompa, Doopity, De.<BR>If you were wise you'd listen me.<BR><BR><BR>Stop all that think-ing aaand just POST.<BR>because I wont let thiis thread to get LOST.<BR>Turn the RidiKerous Level to MOST.<BR><BR>Get back in here and GO!!!!!!!<BR><BR><BR><BR>CUZZZZZZZ:<BR>Thats what Oopma Loompa Doopity DO! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif"border=0><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif"border=0><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif"border=0><BR><BR><BR></i><BR><BR><BR>
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Postby goatboy » Wed Aug 29, 2001 11:11 am

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!<BR><BR>My carp! I've lost my carp!<BR><BR>Awesome 'thenie! You're the best! We luv ya just for that!!!!<BR><BR><BR><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif"border=0><BR><BR><i>SMACK!!! THWACK!!!</i><BR><BR>Ouch!!!
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Postby B_Athena » Wed Aug 29, 2001 11:26 am

Well, I wasnt going to let this thread go down without a fight...or an Ooompa or two <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif"border=0>
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