M00bies - A Community to Remember

What do you think of Tolkien on the silver screen...? Whether Bakshi, Jackson, Amazon, BBC radio play, or whoever else, come on in and discuss your reflections, opinions, and memories...

Postby I-Love-Lucy! » Thu Jan 27, 2005 5:56 pm

Great thread idea, Iavas! I hope as many as possible stop by before they hand Cirdan their tickets. :(

Great idea to post for TLE! He's an important part of our TORC community, present or not.

In that same vein, this username reserves a spot for another former poster, thedaimonlucifer, aka "Lucy". I know many here would have fond memories to share of their conversations with him.

Iavas, is this in keeping with what you wanted to do here? If not, I'll certainly adjust accordingly! :)

Off-topic (temporary, I'll put it elsewhere later, because this is Lucy's corner) :wink:

SamwiseGamgee: :hug: Where do you usually post?

thebachelor, No awards? Here, you want this rose? :P No, wait. You're supposed to be handing them out. Oh, well. :)
Last edited by I-Love-Lucy! on Tue Nov 27, 2007 2:54 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Postby johnboy1 » Thu Jan 27, 2005 6:15 pm

What was Lidless' last post about? I didn't know he was banned either (this was due, in part, to me having no idea who Lidless is).
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Might as well...

Postby Pastor_of_Muppets » Thu Jan 27, 2005 7:47 pm

Pastor_of_Muppets ("Surviving" Member)
Gender Male
Joined Not quite sure. A while ago.
Age 20
Title "You Majesty"
General Stance PJ's LotR waz teh @we$0meSt!11111 .......
Description (Written in the third-person.)

PoM didn't really post much. I don't know why, because he usually had a lot to say on one subject or another. Guess we'll all just have to lament for what could have been...
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Postby Wildwood » Thu Jan 27, 2005 8:28 pm

Is there a branch on this tree for me, Iavas?
and has it been dipped in chocolate?
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Postby Old_Begonia » Thu Jan 27, 2005 9:12 pm

Iavas, Royal wearer of the rubicund rims, great idea!

**runs off to find quill & parchment**

Ridcully, you'd better do your own soon, or some niggling nidget might come along and do it for you. :angeldevil:
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Postby Wilma » Fri Jan 28, 2005 4:15 am

Wowo this is great idea!!! Although I truly hope not to many people sail into the West. I'll see if I can came up with something later :D

I'm curious, is it possible to add links to old threads? I find those old threads before the release of FOTR fascinating. :TORC:

Also who is going to do the bio for Kel?
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Postby Voronwe_the_Faithful » Fri Jan 28, 2005 6:24 am

Or Bernd?

I, however, will do Eli_Cash. :)
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Postby halplm » Fri Jan 28, 2005 9:23 am

halplm (Semi-Retired)

Gender: Male
Joined: 25th November 2003
Age or age group when joined: 26
Most well-known 'title': "Hyperbolic Purist"
General stance on Jackson's LOTR: :club:

Description: (written by himself)
halplm started lurking around TORN early in the life of PJ's films, eagerly following all the production information, as well as excitedly looking forward to the films. FOTR came and went, and halplm was satisfied, if not completely thrilled. TTT came along, and the latent Purism in halplm's veins lurched into the forefront, causing much nausea while watching the film.

As anticipation for ROTK started to rise, halplm discovered TORN's Forums. In an effort to vent some of the purist frustration, he lashed out at the vapid fandom that those boards were and still are. This resulted in a move to TORC, where halplm was much happier. Quickly gaining some notoriety for starting his first thread entitled Well, I was banned from TORN..., halplm had finally arrived.

Although coming late to the party, halplm has become a strong voice for the Purist Camp. While not as elequent as some purists, he has managed to wage some fierce battles. Some arguments with posters such as ArPharazon, and Iavas_Saar reached heights that have helped define the Revisionist vs. Purist argument in the days after the films release.

Addendum: (written by Voronwe_the_Faithful)
After all the films were finally released and digested, halplm wrote a startlingly clear and concise synopsis of his position that won him acclaim from purists and non-purists alike (see I'm done).

* Best Purist (Torcies 2004)
* Best Duo twice, with TolkienPurist, and ArPharazon (Torcies 2004)
* Fledgling of the Year, Male (White Council Awards 2004)

heh, I guess it's ok, but people are free to suggest alterations :)
Last edited by halplm on Fri Jan 28, 2005 10:28 am, edited 4 times in total.
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Postby oldtoby » Fri Jan 28, 2005 9:34 am

Or Bernd?

Did teh Shiney One leave for good? Coulda swore I have seen him around once or twice in the past few months.

Anyhow, I'll do the first bit of mine but I think I will shop around and see If I have any takers to do my description. Seems more fun that way. :wink: (theres gotta be someone in talk willing) :wink:

oldtoby(Most definitely active)

Gender: Male
Joined: 14th January 2002
Age or age group when joined: 26
Most well-known 'title': "Cuddly Studmuffin"
General stance on Jackson's LOTR: Thouroughly enjoyed it, a nice compliment to the books


"Has a rather ordinary memory"- Griffon64

"Toby is a warm, kind-hearted poster with an occasion tendency toward the nicest spam you could ever read." "ROGUE!"- Gaelin the Little

"...and always has the fine lookin' ladies in his sig pic." - Old_Tom_Bombadil

"oldtoby 1. noun The finest weed in the Southfarthing. see: Shire, smoking, Gandalf, Hobbits, Saruman. 2. noun Writer of short posts that are almost always on topic, funny, and easy to comment on. see: sweet, funny, cuddly, studmuffin, eye-rollable, interesting, "special", hugable, nice, fabulous, annoyance (:P -Just playin'!), plushy, encouraging, ironic, adorable, sarcastic, silly, loverly, precious, LOTR fan, crazy, zany, cutie-pie, playful, extraordinary."- Ellehcim

"Old Toby-- n. 1. Something to be smoked in pipes. 2. Someone to be cuddled, laughed at, :P ed at, and generally :hug: ed, who always likes to put suntanned ladies in his sig pics, and who si more or less the only person who can get away with one-line posts without being called a spammer." -Aramel

"Heres one thing I can saw about teh Tobster--he had bad taste in women for his current sig! :P

But mostly just the big goofball we all know and love! :heart: :heart: :hug: -lady*of*rohan

"The Cautionary Tale of tOby.
Who spammed until his brain imploded.
(With apologies to Hilaire Belloc).

The Chief Defect of Old Toby
Was posting even more than me.
He seemed by Madness quite afflicted;
A fact he flatly contradicted.

Admins of the Utmost Fame
Were called at once; but when they came
They answered, as they took their Fees,
"There is no Cure for this Disease.

The boy will post and post away
Until at last you see, one day:
His brain implodes, and he will Die."
At this Old Toby gave a sigh.

"I cannot see that I have spammed
Prophecies and TORC be damned!"
At this outburst Inny shook her head,
And at last Jon stood and said;

"Toby will quite soon be dead.''
His Friends all stood about his Bed
Lamenting his Untimely Death,
When Toby, with his Latest Breath,

Cried, "Oh, my Friends, be warned by me,
That Breakfast, Dinner, Lunch, and Tea
Are all the Human Frame requires...''
With that, the Wretched Man expires.

Good Reader please take care to note
That those with Wisdom never gloat.
And Toby should have listened when his Mam
Explained you cannot live off spam." - Pippin4242

"minty good"- SilverScribe

"Old Toby: A poster of excessive humor and mirth. One of the first posters I ever met on Torc, and one of the nicest to boot. Cuddleh to a fault, but never failing to bring laughs to everyone who reads his posts.

The poster's name is Old Toby.
He gives all the others great joy.
So for his post in the Moobies,
I raise my glass to the boy."- Ildya

"Sooo easy to talk to, really sympathetic, happy, sweet, a TORCer all around A great person to moot with, funny and wonderful." :D - Luthienelflover

And my own thoughts (just cant resist talking about myself in the third person) :wink:

oldtoby joined these auspicious boards right after the FOTR came out, he didnt say much except for a mildly humorous comment in one of Lidlesses comic threads. He mostly avoided serious debate knowing he could not hold his own with, Tele, Leo, Bernd and others. But still enjoyed following along and occasionally putting his two cents in.

TORC Bon Vivant (WCA's 2004)
Last edited by oldtoby on Thu Feb 03, 2005 3:38 pm, edited 3 times in total.
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Postby Berhael » Fri Jan 28, 2005 9:56 am

Berhael (Semi-retired)

Gender: Female
Joined: 9th February 2001
Age or age group when joined: 29
Most well-known 'title': "The fierce archer of the downward year". Alternatively, "TORC's CareBer"
General stance on Jackson's LOTR: Could have been better, could have been so much worse. Or more graphically: :happydance: + :pull:

Description (written by Berself):

Although I remember joining back in the days when finarfin, Hama, Gandalf's Mum and Kelannar were everyday visitors, and it feels like last year, I'm still shocked when I see my join date and think of all the time I've spent here. :shock:

I started out cautious about the movies, then promptly fell in love with FotR, even though a few bits rubbed me the wrong way (Wizard-fu, Blue Lórien, Predator Lurtz). Had bad First Viewing Syndrome with TTT, and RotK propelled me to the Purist side of my traditionally fence-sitting, Pragmatic stance. Every time, the EEs have resuscitated my love for these movies, and after watching the whole shebang together one weekend, I made my peace with them and PJ. There are still parts that I skip on the DVDs, and I'm not 100% (not even 90%) happy with the films, but I acknowledge their immense achievement, and was very happy about them (it wasn't really for RotK only and everybody knows that) sweeping the board at the Oscars 2004. :)

About this community... Prompted by Telemachos, who originally posted the idea, I maintained a list of "Who would play you if TORC was made into a movie?", which contained genius casting decisions such as Hama as John Cleese (I'm afraid that I was the instigator of that particular rumour :oops: ), Gungnir and Saranthir as Statler and Waldorf, the two grumpy old guys from the Muppets, and yours truly as a Care Bear.

I took part in Swooning Threads for Iavas_Saar, Whistler (still the Master of Swooning), and a little bit for Democritus too, who would eventually become my Wyrd Sister, together with Breogán (although most people who remember the Wyrd Sisters at all would probably only remember Bré and me... Demo should have worn a sheer top in that sigpic too. Or maybe not :D). Through the swooning threads I got to know people such as Tookish_Traveller, theduffster, ateelah, vynaca_of_Mirkw00t, Mammo, Ethel, ~Lee, ridcully, OldBegonia...

I also took some baby steps towards caring for poor lost n00bies with a helpful "all you need to know about M00bies"-type thread, which didn't get too far because, among other things, I'm not adopter stock... :D

I also did some RP-lite in one of the Mod Deathmatches (cheering for Kestrel and Tele), and helped present the 2004 TORCies that Lidless organised. My highlight of that particular evening was winning "Best Osgiliath Award". Boy, that was fun. :D (being arrested onstage by Blackwood for derailing a Mod announcement right after accepting the award was the icing on the cake :oops:)

I've always regarded myself as a m00b, even when I didn't post here that much and spent most of my time in Manwe and Talk. Although I think that I've contributed a bit, in the "discussion" sense of the term, I suspect that most of my contribution to TORC has been through my endless chattering on and off the boards, so to me TORC is much more a social place where I met friends and had good fun than a scholarly archive.

I wrote my PhD thesis while being a full-time TORCer, and TORC heard of my viva results and my first post-PhD job before than anyone in my family. Every year I do my best to attend as many moots and gatherings as possible (I was at the very first UK TORCMoot in Oxford), since I love meeting up with friends, and being a Spaniard living in England it was difficult for me at first to make native acquaintances. For that only I would be grateful to the boards. :)

Usually I'd rather not get into the trap of listing those people I got to know, love and admire here in M00bies and on TORC in general, for fear of leaving someone out, but I can't resist, off the top of my head... Whistler, Hama, finarfin, Diamond of Long Cleeve, Telemachos, mandos, Angbasdil, akallabeth, Leoba, fatcatdave, niniel*, chicki, Iavas Saar, ArPharazon, EdaintheRanger, Hobbituk, hashberry, Alys, wilko185, Callë, Breogán, Darin Bloodaxe, FrodotheWise, Melthavron, TheLidlessEyes, laureanna, truehobbit, Andri, The Angel, Voronwe, Farawen, Jnyusa, *E*V*E*N*S*T*A*R*, Alandriel, Rodia, gimli_axe_wielder, Democritus, Eruname127, Griffon64, satch, Alassea (Leafy)... the list is truly endless.

I've also been a Procrastinator Extraordinaire, and that trait of me persists now that I dither between staying here and leaving these shores.

Nominations and awards:
* Winner of Best Derailed Thread (The Osgiliath Award): "New Restrictions on Post-count Celebration Threads", together with Blackwood and TheLidlessEyes.
* Nominated for...
Best On-Screen Duo, TORCies 2004: Berhael & TheLidlessEyes
Cybervixen, White Council Awards 2003
Critics Circle, White Council Awards 2004
Last edited by Berhael on Fri Feb 04, 2005 7:29 pm, edited 3 times in total.
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Postby Voronwe_the_Faithful » Fri Jan 28, 2005 9:59 am


Addendum to description (written by Voronwe the Faithful)

After all the films were finally released and digested, halplm wrote a startlingly clear and concise synopsis of his position that won him acclaim from purists and non-purists alike (see I'm done.)
Last edited by Voronwe_the_Faithful on Fri Jan 28, 2005 11:00 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby halplm » Fri Jan 28, 2005 10:23 am

Voronwe_the_Faithful wrote:halplm

Addendum to description (written by Voronwe the Faithful)

After all the films were finally released and digested, halplm wrote a startlingly clear and concise synopsis of his position that won him acclaim from purists and non-purists alike (see I'm done.

Thanks, VtF
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Postby halplm » Fri Jan 28, 2005 10:43 am

Another thought too, and I know the thread was "about" me, so I might enjoy reading it more, but the "Well I was banned..." Thread is a phenominally good snapshot of the Movies Forum at the time... It read's like a who's who at a time when the forum was perhaps at its peak, right before ROTK's release.

Fun stuff, and I still don't know how it got so many replies...
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Postby Diamond of Long Cleeve » Fri Jan 28, 2005 12:01 pm

What a lovely idea this is, Iavas. :)

Diamond of Long Cleeve, aka Pearl in other places

Gender: Female
Joined: May 2000
Age or age group when joined: 39
Most well-known 'title': Mistress of Great Smials? Pervy Frolijah Fancier? You tell me. :lol:
General stance on Jackson's LOTR: Pretty positive :)

I joined TORC in May 2000, having first learned about the films in August 1999. I was taken aback by the purism of M00bies. People who felt positive about the films could be given very sharp shrift. I was genuinely surprised at how negative so many people seemed to be. XenArwen rumours notwithstanding (and I did have my worries about that), I had mainly good vibes about the PJ project - great cast, for one thing! I'm afraid I found some of the debates during that time pretentious as well as vindictive. However, there was enough wit and intelligence around to persuade me to stay. And really, I wouldn't have missed all the pre-film anticipation and angst for anything. :D I saw it as my mission to keep the good vibes going for PJ's LOTR on the TORC M00bies Forum. :twisted:

My criticisms of PJ's LOTR are to do with some of the characterisation and writing decisions - and, on occasion, PJ's directorial style. Overall, I think the films are fabulous. I enjoyed them enormously as cinema and they have only made me appreciate the book even more!

I've had a right laugh here at times. And learned a great deal from many other people - Semprini's eloquent insights into Tolkien's use of metaphor, for one thing. :)

The best thing about Tolkien fandom - indeed, about any fandom - is how multi-cultural and international it is. :)

Nominations and awards:
I have no idea. To tell the truth: I have never, in my five years of fandom, been into awards and popularity contests. Just not my thing. :)
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Postby halplm » Fri Jan 28, 2005 12:16 pm

No, I did not write this ;)

TheLidlessEyes (premature discharge)

Gender: Male
Joined: 18 Feb 2002
Age or age group when joined: 38
Most well-known 'title': "Now with headlights!"
General stance on Jackson's LOTR: Probably sitting down. They’re quite long.

Other main aliases:TheRoadPet, Simon_Cowell

Description: Balding.

Best Claims To Fame: Has met more TORCers in real life than anyone else. Attended the European Premiere of TTT and ROTK.

Torcies 2003 - Best Comedic Performance
Torcies 2003 - Best Rumor That Didn’t Come True
WCAs 2003 - Best Comedic Performance
WCAs 2003 - Best Sig Pics
Torcies 2004 - Best Thread
Torcies 2004 - Best Derailed Thread
Torcies 2004 - Best Parody / Humorous Thread
Torcies 2004 - Lifetime Achievement Award
Tolkien Online 2004 - Best Sig Pic
Talk Awards 2004 - Best One Liners
Talk Awards 2004 - Best Sickest Mind

Other Nominations:
Torcies 2003 - Best Parody / Humorous Thread
Torcies 2003 - Best Breakthrough Performance
Torcies 2004 - Best Enlightening Thread
Torcies 2004 - Best Parody / Humorous Thread (3 other nominations)
Talk Awards 2004 - Best Cross Forum Poster
Talk Awards 2004 - Coffee Splatter Award
Talk Awards 2004 - Best Prankster
Talk Awards 2004 - Best On-Line Romance (with Alassante_Estel, his fiancée)
Talk Awards 2004 - Poster Most Likely To Be Sitting At The Computer Nude
Took himself out of the running for all the WCAs 2004, the Torcies 2004 - Best Comedic Performance, and the TORCies 2004 - Best Sig Pics
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Postby Iavas_Saar » Fri Jan 28, 2005 2:53 pm

Firstly, thanks everyone for the contributions so far. :) There are many, many more people that need to be added, which is going to take a while. I'm guessing there would be atleast 200 who've been part of this community over the years.

Secondly, I'm wondering whether to rename the project. "An Historical Record" may not have the best ring to it - can anyone think of anything better? The other title I toyed with was "M00bies - A Community to Remember".

Thirdly, LadyA asked me to make it official what tense people should write their descriptions in. Personally, I would prefer first person. But I would say if you really would prefer to write in third person, that's fine. I will always include who is writing the description, whether it's in the poster's own words, or by someone else.

Fourthly, with regards to Lidless, I would say it's best to contact him and find out how he would like his profile done. Though whatever he wants, I can always add personal testaments to his profile from anyone who wants to comment on him. :)

hal, Lidless was Simon_Cowell? :shock: When was this announced? :P And I need to know if that's definitely going to be Lidless's "official" profile, and if so, who I should say wrote it? :P (by the way, I like your personal description, I don't think anyone would want it altered).

TragicNiniel, that's a great profile, and not too long. :) Though I'm surprised about the part on your TORC heroes :blush:

Samwise Gamgee, I'm sorry to hear you were having a bad day. Taking that into account, are you going to edit your profile at all, or do you want it submitted the way it is?

ridcully, good to see you again! And thank you very much for the congrats :D I would have loved to see your scream ;) You must definitely submit a profile, you're one of the many names I'll want to recall 30 years from now. :) (You too Begonia! :D)

Wildwood, of course you must be part of this! :) This thread is for everyone who's been a part of Movies, and you obviously have. Cerin, I hope you'll be submitting something?

Di, you may not have been into awards, but you sure deserve some. :) And I think you did get some nominations in the TORCies (Lidless's Movie forum awards), though I can't find the old threads to confirm. edit - Actually you won an award, "Most missed Oldbie" in the 2003 TORCies, as well as being nominated for "Best Pragmatist". :) I can't find the 2004 TORCies thread though. Is it okay if I add your awards/noms to your profile, or would you rather they not be mentioned?

Wilma, yes it is possible to add links to old threads. :) As for Kelennar's bio, anyone is welcome to step forward and do it. I will accept the first one submitted (unless anyone objects to it), and then anyone who wants to add extra comments to the profile can do so.

Voronwe, I know that vynaca posted in Movies-Other recently, it would be good to get her in here to do Bernd's profile, and her own (not forgetting bernil ;)).

Texas-hobbit, that is a nice idea to get people together to do something for "Lucy" - that is just the sort of thing I want to happen for any well-remembered posters no longer posting here. :) The comment you want added to ridcully's profile is also perfectly in keeping with what I'm wanting to do here (Voronwe has the idea too). :D You must do your *own* profile as well though ;)

I'll end with a reminder:

If at any time you want to add an extra comment to someone's profile you can do so.
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Postby Stupid_Orcs » Fri Jan 28, 2005 3:15 pm

Simon_Cowell!! Man, that was one of the funniest things ever! I had a huge laugh over that (and an even bigger relief when it was just Lidless). :)
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Postby Iavas_Saar » Fri Jan 28, 2005 6:42 pm

Check the first post for a current list of community members. Please point out any omissions or mistakes I might have made!
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Postby Faramond » Fri Jan 28, 2005 7:50 pm

First of all, its vison, not vision.

Second of all, where's Anthriel? Is she filed under 'Z' or something?

Third of all, I know I'm being a nitpicky jerk, for I realize mistakes are inevitable on such a long list. Nevertheless, you should feel ashamed. I recommend you be docked 400 posts from your post count. :D
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Postby eomer32 » Fri Jan 28, 2005 8:03 pm

no "eomer 32" ...hmm (goes back to the Houses of Lamentation)
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Postby Iavas_Saar » Fri Jan 28, 2005 8:13 pm

Faramond, eomer, at the start of my list I wrote "I'm sure there are some I've missed out" - I knew the list wouldn't be complete, because I'm not familiar with everyone who posts here. I will happily add anyone who submits a profile or is suggested by another poster. :)

I will add Anthriel and eomer to the list, and correct my spelling of "vison" - I'd always been reading it wrong!

Now Faramond and eomer, you both need to submit profiles for yourself. :)
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Postby eomer32 » Fri Jan 28, 2005 8:38 pm

eomer32 (wanderer from afar)

gender Male
joined A coupla years ago
age or age group when joined mid-30's
why? because having a forum to share my (mostly) drunken rantings about the most important thing in my life (less my wife and "Stiller" football seemed kinda cool
leige lord(s) (whither they would have me or no) Whistler, Bernd, TLE, ccMisOrliLvr, Marty and various other cool cats who's names escape me
excitement factor gleaned from this site incalcuable, it's been a joy each and every damn time!
favorite subject posting I once posted an idea for a book that showed what happened when LOTR became such a world wide phenomenom that the nations of the world actually adopted and began to live in a Middle Earth culture, replete with goodies, baddies, etc...that would've been the wine talking, at that point, but it was fun!
favorite argument once "argued" some inane issue with Eli_Cash that had to do with, I think, Gandalf and his flight from Orthanc and his subsequent return...again, I think...it was...late...
favorite topic hmmm...the Puffy Orc, apples V oranges...too many to consider....

Thoughts on PJ's adapation? What can I say? As a card-carrying Pragmatist, I absolutely LOVED it...PJ's LOTR became an "alternate history" of the "alternate history" that Tolkien so astoundingly wrote...too many good moments to even delve into...but I will mention two of 'em "the Prologue" (still a great idea for a two hour action movie) and the "Smeagol/Deagol" debate...wow...

Description of Self Look, I am what I am, I'm a hard working Western Pennsylvania guy (if you even know what that MIGHT mean you'll understand) I love football ( I coached high school ball for 5 years) I love to drink beer (by and large) I have a beautiful, cool as heck wife, a nice home and a family that cares for me very deeply. This entire episode (PJ's work) has been the culmination of TWENTY YEARS of geeky goodness personified. It's made me happy, it's made me a (somehow, yes) better person and it's made me want to WRITE (something my brother and my father do for a living after a fashion). I love each and every one of you, posters, lurkers, mods et al, very much and I thank you all for making this experience the best I could've ever hoped it to be!

I guess that'll do...

Last edited by eomer32 on Fri Jan 28, 2005 11:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Old_Tom_Bombadil » Fri Jan 28, 2005 8:42 pm

Thomas Hardy wrote:Her Temple

Dear, think not that they will forget you:
--If craftsmanly art should be mine
I will build up a temple, and set you
Therein as its shrine.

They may say: "Why a woman such honour?"
--Be told, "O, so sweet was her fame,
That a man heaped this splendour upon her;
None now knows his name."
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Postby Iavas_Saar » Fri Jan 28, 2005 8:51 pm

eomer, thanks for the profile - and some good ideas for extra questions people can answer about themselves. :)

Old_Tom, I'm not sure what point you're trying to make with that poem?

edit - As no suggestions were forthcoming, I went ahead and changed the thread title - I hope it's okay. :)
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Postby Whistler » Fri Jan 28, 2005 9:04 pm

Already I have sailed into the West; and yes!––there is internet service here. Who would have imagined that those within sight of the Blessed Realm would care about such nonsense? Fortunately everybody here has said NO to the proposed Taco Bell, so perhaps there is hope for the place, after all.

I suppose I should put in a word for the TORC time capsule that Iavas has envisioned. I shall be uncharacteristically brief, or make the attempt. Fat chance!

I am a designer, artist, illustrator, cartoonist, sculptor, poet, actor, editor, author of juvenile literature and writer of general foolishness. I am numbered (by me) among the great geniuses of our time. Unfortunately my knowledge of Tolkien has always been barely enough to protect me from humiliation from the many experts who comprise this august body; so usually I have contributed mainly satires and silliness in hope of concealing the Moria-sized gaps in my Tolkien scholarship. Most of what I do know of Tolkien (at least, all the really juicy things) I learned at TORC, from perusing your remarks for several years; and I thank you all––God bless us, every one!––for the many ways in which you have kept me sharp and curious.

You will read, in the above paragraph, my characteristic combination of pompous self-promotion and effusive (though sincere, I promise!) gushing about my friends and colleagues. This is only one of the many characteristics that cause a lot of people to wonder if they ought to detest or adore me. Usually I recommend a mixture of both, but suit yourself. You might do well to consider, as you make your evaluation, that I look a great deal like Winnie-the-Pooh. You can usually get away with plenty, if you look like that.

I am approaching the dreaded mid-century mark in age. I am short (see above). I am married to a lady who could have done better and probably will in time. I have a dog named Toto who looks exactly as a dog named Toto ought to look. He has appeared onstage (as himself) in The Wizard of Oz. His wiener-eating scene was a theatrical sensation. I live on a lake, and I own a pirate ship (all right, a raft) that I built myself. My wife and I like to go sailing with our cutlasses, flintlocks and three-cornered hats. I wanted to install a small cannon on the thing, but I have been informed that this is prohibited by certain (entirely unreasonable!) neighborhood zoning restrictions. I like licorice––yes, I’m out of the closet––and I don’t care that nobody else does.

However much Kelannar disliked any one of you, I was his favorite TORCer to detest. No, I never actually fought with him––that would have been a waste of time––but I took unfair advantage of his total inability to understand the concept of humor. Harassing the handicapped, that’s what it was! My shame is too great for me to bear.

I have been here, along with my arch-nemesis Hama, since the Age of Dinosaurs. Unfortunately I ceased to contribute anything worthwhile around the time that FOTR was released; and after that time I became a pale and pathetic shadow of myself, living on former glories like a creaky old soldier who has fought in some Glorious Cause and insists on reliving his victories. These were dark days: For ages I lived in a filth-strewn alley, posting from a kerosene-powered computer and earning my bread as a tap-dancing street entertainer.

During this otherwise dreadful period, I enjoyed the soothing attentions of the multitude of pale and lovesick pre-Raphaelite damozels who frequented TORC’s largest and most famous (or infamous) swooning thread. To each of these I offer a perfect white lily as a token of eternal respect and devotion. A special word of deep appreciation, submitted with 14th-Century Florentine fervor, I offer to Doctor Berhael––ah, yes, the divine Berhael!––my Mistress of Swoons, who always performed her duties splendidly.

As Oscar once observed––oh, bah! Who cares for silly Oscar? As if the clever Whistler, the wise and magnificent Whistler, were ever in need of a quote from silly Oscar! Possibly Degas, but never Oscar. As I observed the other day, while sipping an iced absinthe––

My apologies. I am inclined, on odd occasions, to morph into my namesake. I think I am over it, now. I have been taking medication, but it takes a good while for this stuff to kick in.

Now, where was I? Ah, yes, I was keeping things brief.

Perhaps I should mention Peter Jackson, and the movie? I loved it, all of it. I am one of a handful of TORCers who can watch the whole thing without cringing or covering my ears. The reason is simple: The film is not (and could never have been) Tolkien’s Lord Of the Rings. Tolkien alone could have given us that.

No, it is a new mythology based on an earlier mythology. It is close to the old myth, but sometimes it runs in new directions and sometimes it even runs against the old myth. This is hardly new! Let’s talk (for example) about the Arthurian myths: What do we mean, exactly? Mallory, Tennyson, White? Possibly Boorman, or even Monty Python? From the beginning, I really expected no more than a re-interpretation of the myth. And it is a testament to Tolkien that his work is good enough to warrant (and hold up to) a re-mythologizing for a new audience and a new medium. The many criticisms leveled against the film are (in many cases) well-founded; but to me they are simply irrelevant.

Speaking of irrelevant––these remarks are now concluded!
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Postby Iavas_Saar » Fri Jan 28, 2005 9:12 pm

Whistler, brilliant. :D Will Hama be able to match that? We'll see ;)
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Postby eomer32 » Fri Jan 28, 2005 9:15 pm

Eru bless Whistler, my Liege Lord, whither he would have me or not

(of all the sights I've seen in these unhappy times, a Whistler posting is MOST WELCOME!)
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Postby Mighty_Squid » Fri Jan 28, 2005 9:18 pm

Mighty_Squid (surviving member)

Gender: Female
Joined: Jan 23 03
Age or age group when joined: 25ish
Most well-known 'title': "Something Squid-like"
General stance on Jackson's LOTR: Pragmatist

Description: (in her own words)

Technically I joined TORC in Jan of 03 but I just lurked until April of 03 when I finally posted. Do to a deadly combination of an obsessive personality and a really boring job that post led to many others. Despite the fact I never was able to join the more serious discussions I quickly became a regular. The final nail in my coffin was when the ROTK "trailer" was leaked on TORN. I was able to get a mirror up and help about 1,000 people see the trailer. I am also known as being the #1 Gimli fan. :)

I have touched Whistler.

WCA Newbie of the Year 2003
TORCie Newbie of the Year 2004
TORCie Best Not Involved in a Debate 2004

TORCie Best Username 2004
TORCie Best Goodie Two Shoes 2004

Have I forgot anything?
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Postby Lord_Baltimore » Fri Jan 28, 2005 9:44 pm

Lord_Baltimore (surviving member)

Sex: Male
Joined: About three years ago
Age or age group when joined: 33
Most well-known 'title': <expletive deleted!>
General stance on Jackson's LOTR: Disappointed

Other main aliases: Manwe_Sulimo

Description (in his own words):
I dont remember how I became aware of Tolkien Online or when, exactly, I joined; but, I am glad that I did. The two words that I think best characterise this website are "quality" and "professionalism." "Quality" in the manner in which the website is designed and presented; "professionalism," in the manner in which the website is run. One of the principal reasons why I remained a member was the professional manner in which the Mods ran the forum. The other principal reason why I remained was, and is, the quality of the other members, themselves. As I remarked in the "congratulatory" thread named in my honour, because the members of Tolkien Online are, generally, people of an obviously high level of intelligence and knowledge about Tolkien's works, one must "rise to the challenge" of being among such capable individuals. I would like to say that I did, but that is not for me to say.

There are several persons -- "friend" and "foe," alike -- with whom I've particularly enjoyed corresponding. They are, namely:

    Diamond of Long Cleeve

I've also enjoyed the humour posted by Hama and Whistler, and I've had a lot of fun trying to figure out what, exactly, Wildwood is. :-)

Best Claims To Fame:
I had the honour of having my review of Peter Jackson's The Two Towers posted on the front page of Tolkien Online.

None known.
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Postby ridcully » Sat Jan 29, 2005 12:51 am

Ridcully (surviving member but goes months without posting)

Gender: Female

Joined: February 3rd 2002

Age or age group when joined: 18

Most well known title: Universal Nuisance

General stance on PJ's LotR: Very happy and satisified


Wanting to be like my older brother who was a member of an action figure messageboard I went looking for a Lord of the Rings messageboard. This was the first one I found that I actually liked the style and layout. I posted like a maniac my first day because I wanted to be cool and have all of the little swords and shields like everyone else. I was pretty much ignored and labeled as a n00bie for the first few months. The day I happened to stumble into the Whistler swooning thread was the day that changed. I guess my oh so excellent swooning made me a little more popular. I don't know. I could just be speaking out of my bum. But after joining that thread I made more friends.

I never really took part in any of the big debates. I never liked debating. Mostly because I get angry at the people who don't agree with me. So I would always steer clear of those and join in on the more lighthearted threads. Such as The Whistler Swooning thread, Iavas swooning thread, any theme month threads, and of course the MOME competition threads!

MOME has to be my favorite thing about this board. I remember having a conversation with Duffy or Mammo about the idea of having a pageant. We all thought is was an excellent idea. And no matter how long I'm gone I'll always return for the MOME pageant. I was sad I wasn't able to participate this last year. But I noticed that Merry was left unsponsored. I guess it's well known that he's MINE! :D I was very flattered that this was said about my MOME contribution.
Texas-Hobbit said: ridcully's hilariously droll contribution to the 2003 MOME pageant is worth going back for another read-through. Merry never had a more patient and long-suffering sponsor.
Thank you Tex! :D
In conclusion I want all of my TORC buddies to know that being a member of this messageboard has definitely made an impression on my life. The friendships I've made will always last and I'll always remember the good times I've had here. Everyone here is so hilarious, I've never laughed so hard, so much on one website before. I wish my friends in reality were like my friends here on TORC. That's a compliment. Take it! But the day that TORC is made into a movie, I'll definitely come back for that.


Awards: Fourth place in MOME I (not really an award but I think it's worth mentioning. ;) )

Awwww!!!!11 Award, MOME II
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